Venting i just want to feel important to someone

[HowlingCoyote]

he moved recently, and he just got internet now at his new place, and he's more excited to talk to his friends than me. he said we'd sleep on the phone together. i got 3 hrs of sleep last night, ive staye dup all day for him, he knows this. but he'd rather spend all night with the m instead of me like he said.. i just want to feel important to anyone at all for once in my life whats even the point ive never felt loved the same way i love people. i wanna die so bad i just want the pain to be over. i cut his name into my skin again the other night, i felt so weak again, i hadnt cut in weeks. i failed again i keep failing ijust want him to love me like i love him

 

[Lamentice]

He's shown you his hand, now follow your own advice and take care of yourself.

 

[violetforever]

ijust want him to love me like i love him

they never love you when you put them above yourself. i thought they would too.

whats even the point ive never felt loved the same way i love people.

i love and hate this feeling. i love to know that i am capable of deeply caring for someone. i hate that it's been proved that nobody is capable of doing the same for me. oh well. i'll pretend being there for myself is enough because it has to be.

 

[HowlingCoyote]

He's shown you his hand, now follow your own advice and take care of yourself.

if i want someone to love me the way i love them, then surely there is something about me to love. thank you, i appreciate this a lot. i'm trying to learn how to want to take care of myself, it's hard, but it's good to know im not alone and get things out on here.

they never love you when you put them above yourself. i thought they would too.

i love and hate this feeling. i love to know that i am capable of deeply caring for someone. i hate that it's been proved that nobody is capable of doing the same for me. oh well. i'll pretend being there for myself is enough because it has to be.

sometimes all you can do is be there for yourself and that's enough. it's hard when you don't feel like you have anyone. i know i have to be my own rock sometimes but it's hard to want to be

 

[Alpacachino]

You're wired a bit different than most people. But in a good way. You like to put yourself out there and love people more. However, when you do that, you're also taken for granted by them. This is just the way it works. A little distance is good.

What is that saying? Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

 

[praythestars]

I understand this feeling deeply. I consistently feel I put more into others than I ever get back.

I thought it'd be different when I found a truly good person, and I did, and I married that person. He is my soulmate, have been for at least a decade. But he just can't. Not because he doesn't want to, but I think most people who have their own issues just aren't able to get out of their head enough to still truly put others first.

When things were going well, he was able to, but it seems for most once they encounter difficulty, that supercedes anything and anyone else, even if they try to fight it.

I'm not sure about your guy, or why he can't, and I wish I could say if you truly find your person (him or not) it'll be different, but I'm not sure it is. I think people like us are in the minority, we're able and willing to put aside our pain to lift others up, even to our detriment.

If I could go back in time and give myself any advice on the matter I'd try my best to get me to put that extra energy into almost anything else. Health, education, work, overall betterment. That doesn't mean I'd tell myself not to live people, but I'd try to explain that the vast majority of people can only live so much.

Love as much as they can give you and put the rest into anything else. It might not get rid of the emotional pain, but it can get rid of some potential financial or physical pain.

 

[capi]

they never love you when you put them above yourself. i thought they would too.

i love and hate this feeling. i love to know that i am capable of deeply caring for someone. i hate that it's been proved that nobody is capable of doing the same for me. oh well. i'll pretend being there for myself is enough because it has to be.

I never never understood this.
They never love us like we love them.

How come people like us NEVER will find other people like us? NEVER!! Its like the universe tries so hard to prevent us from meeting eachother, when its apparent SO MANY OF US EXIST!!

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

Love and respect yourself first, and you'll never be in the position of wanting someone to love you as much as you love them ever again.

 

[violetforever]

I never never understood this.
They never love us like we love them.

How come people like us NEVER will find other people like us? NEVER!! Its like the universe tries so hard to prevent us from meeting eachother, when its apparent SO MANY OF US EXIST!!

tbh i have given up. i don't care to find someone else like me because of how disillusioned i already am in love and other people now. once was enough hurt for a lifetime. i wonder the same thing. what is the point of having this ability to care so much for other people when they just take advantage of it? i feel like we are left with nothing but our kindness while cruel people get their way. or at least appear to do so. i still have some naive thinking that anyone cruel can't be truly happy with themselves or their life.

 

[HowlingCoyote]

I never never understood this.
They never love us like we love them.

How come people like us NEVER will find other people like us? NEVER!! Its like the universe tries so hard to prevent us from meeting eachother, when its apparent SO MANY OF US EXIST!!

i just want to find someone like me. i thought he was like me, but even i'm too much for someone like me. i dont think theres anyone out there who can handle my love, and it hurts

 

[capi]

i just want to find someone like me. i thought he was like me, but even i'm too much for someone like me. i dont think theres anyone out there who can handle my love, and it hurts

tbh i have given up. i don't care to find someone else like me because of how disillusioned i already am in love and other people now. once was enough hurt for a lifetime. i wonder the same thing. what is the point of having this ability to care so much for other people when they just take advantage of it? i feel like we are left with nothing but our kindness while cruel people get their way. or at least appear to do so. i still have some naive thinking that anyone cruel can't be truly happy with themselves or their life.

Reposting because original comment was glitched?

Unfortunately i gave up as well. The lowest points were never worth the highest, even though the highest points with him were the happiest moments in my life. I never want to go through that again. I have forever hurt and ptsd.

My happiest moments were with him and i cant believe he just never valued me like that. I was a burden on him. i hate my life

 

[violetforever]

Unfortunately i gave up as well. The lowest points were never worth the highest, even though the highest points with him were the happiest moments in my life. I never want to go through that again. I have forever hurt and ptsd.

oh you get me i'm sorry for the both of us.