Darkover
Archangel
- Jul 29, 2021
- 5,467
Both "just make the best of it" and "life is what you make of it" are simplistic, dismissive statements that ignore the realities of suffering, external circumstances, and the inherent unfairness of existence. Here's why they're flawed:
Not everything in life is within personal control. You don't get to choose:
Where you're born
Your genetics (mental health, intelligence, physical health)
Whether you grow up in poverty or wealth
The people who raise you (abusive parents vs. loving parents)
The economic or political system you're stuck in
Someone born into extreme suffering—whether due to illness, war, or trauma—can't just "make the best of it" as if effort alone will overcome everything. Saying "life is what you make of it" suggests that people who suffer just aren't trying hard enough, which is blatantly false.
These statements imply that if you're miserable, it's your fault for not "making the best of it." In reality, many problems aren't fixable by sheer willpower. Telling a person struggling with depression, chronic pain, or extreme poverty that they just need to "make life better" is cruel and ignorant.
A starving person can't just "make the best of hunger."
A disabled person can't just "make the best of physical suffering."
A trauma survivor can't just "turn their pain into something positive" like flipping a switch.
These phrases act as cop-outs to avoid addressing real suffering.
For some, no amount of effort will make life worth living. If someone is in constant pain, physically or mentally, telling them to "make the best of it" assumes that staying alive is always the better option. But if life is more suffering than joy, why should someone be forced to endure it just because others believe in the "power of attitude"?
Saying "life is what you make of it" implies that success and happiness come purely from effort. But luck plays a massive role:
Some people are born into wealth, which makes life infinitely easier.
Some have supportive families, while others grow up in abusive homes.
Some are naturally gifted with intelligence, health, or talent, while others struggle just to function.
Effort matters, but it's not the ultimate deciding factor in how life turns out. The world isn't a level playing field.
These phrases are often used to silence people who are suffering. Instead of acknowledging that life is hard, unfair, and often painful, these statements tell people to stop complaining and accept it. They don't provide solutions; they just pressure people to pretend everything is fine.
Both of these statements are simplistic, dismissive, and ignorant of reality. They assume that life is fair, that effort alone determines outcomes, and that suffering is just a mindset issue rather than a real, unavoidable condition. They're used to deflect responsibility from those who create suffering (e.g., parents, society) and place the blame on the individual instead.
Life isn't just what you make of it—life is largely what is forced upon you.
Not everything in life is within personal control. You don't get to choose:
Where you're born
Your genetics (mental health, intelligence, physical health)
Whether you grow up in poverty or wealth
The people who raise you (abusive parents vs. loving parents)
The economic or political system you're stuck in
Someone born into extreme suffering—whether due to illness, war, or trauma—can't just "make the best of it" as if effort alone will overcome everything. Saying "life is what you make of it" suggests that people who suffer just aren't trying hard enough, which is blatantly false.
These statements imply that if you're miserable, it's your fault for not "making the best of it." In reality, many problems aren't fixable by sheer willpower. Telling a person struggling with depression, chronic pain, or extreme poverty that they just need to "make life better" is cruel and ignorant.
A starving person can't just "make the best of hunger."
A disabled person can't just "make the best of physical suffering."
A trauma survivor can't just "turn their pain into something positive" like flipping a switch.
These phrases act as cop-outs to avoid addressing real suffering.
For some, no amount of effort will make life worth living. If someone is in constant pain, physically or mentally, telling them to "make the best of it" assumes that staying alive is always the better option. But if life is more suffering than joy, why should someone be forced to endure it just because others believe in the "power of attitude"?
Saying "life is what you make of it" implies that success and happiness come purely from effort. But luck plays a massive role:
Some people are born into wealth, which makes life infinitely easier.
Some have supportive families, while others grow up in abusive homes.
Some are naturally gifted with intelligence, health, or talent, while others struggle just to function.
Effort matters, but it's not the ultimate deciding factor in how life turns out. The world isn't a level playing field.
These phrases are often used to silence people who are suffering. Instead of acknowledging that life is hard, unfair, and often painful, these statements tell people to stop complaining and accept it. They don't provide solutions; they just pressure people to pretend everything is fine.
Both of these statements are simplistic, dismissive, and ignorant of reality. They assume that life is fair, that effort alone determines outcomes, and that suffering is just a mindset issue rather than a real, unavoidable condition. They're used to deflect responsibility from those who create suffering (e.g., parents, society) and place the blame on the individual instead.
Life isn't just what you make of it—life is largely what is forced upon you.
