Venting i feel like sometimes i wanna ctb because of money

[aeri]

honestly sometimes i get the impression i actually could be happy. my passion could satisfy me way more. but i have to pay rents. i have to have a job. im trapped. im worthless because i am not able to make money

i know it's my fault if i am unhappy, if i cant be someone right. but like... i could love my life so much. it's such a waste

but i feel like i have to die. i am not able to make money. i feel like i have to make money, and that's all. i could have been happy. that's how it is.

thank god i have alcohol. even though it may ruin me. that's how it is. i hate my life. i could have liked it. that's how it is. i have to die

 

[Pain In The Ass]

enough money not to have to work and to be able to live alone so I can sleep better and eat healthier would certainly help with my chronic pain, which is the root cause of my CTB desires

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that you suffer so much, this life really is so unfair. I know that it is so dreadful being trapped in a life you hate. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.