Venting i don't want my friend to love me back

[emptymiku]

i've been friends with someone since the beginning of this year. they're my only friend. i ended up developing feelings for them and recently theyve been showing signs that they might feel the same way about me but... that's going to weaken our bond somehow, and i know it. i've never even been in a relationship before. i'm eventually going to disappoint them and that'll hurt them even more when that time comes. i wish i knew what to do... they're an online friend and i wish i could meet them in person one day but it doesn't seem likely. i'll try to think of some sort of way to prevent them from saying anything about it but i just don't know yet ... ugh :( i wish my feelings were unrequited so i didn't risk losing them even more

 

[kazatte]

oh that sounds so awful i'm so sorry :( if you don't mind me asking, why exactly do you think that'll weaken your bond? like do you think if you end up breaking up your relationship will have changed + you won't be able to go back to being friends again? i get the feeling though don't worry

side note i love niigo SO MUCH so i looooove your general profile!!

 

[emptymiku]

oh that sounds so awful i'm so sorry :( if you don't mind me asking, why exactly do you think that'll weaken your bond? like do you think if you end up breaking up your relationship will have changed + you won't be able to go back to being friends again? i get the feeling though don't worry

side note i love niigo SO MUCH so i looooove your general profile!!

i just feel like it's easier for a romantic relationship to break than a platonic one, and that there would be no turning back. i also don't wanna edate anyone yk

 

[kazatte]

i just feel like it's easier for a romantic relationship to break than a platonic one, and that there would be no turning back. i also don't wanna edate anyone yk

OH i missed that they were an online friend. yeah edating is hard for many people, especially with someone who you're already friends with. it's not like they consistently work out or don't work out, so it's hard to overcome your thoughts about them. i totally understand you though

do you think like. forcing yourself to get over them would work? or alternatively, would you be okay with rejecting them if they DO like you back? like just telling them you're not ready for a relationship or you don't like them like that

 

[emptymiku]

OH i missed that they were an online friend. yeah edating is hard for many people, especially with someone who you're already friends with. it's not like they consistently work out or don't work out, so it's hard to overcome your thoughts about them. i totally understand you though

do you think like. forcing yourself to get over them would work? or alternatively, would you be okay with rejecting them if they DO like you back? like just telling them you're not ready for a relationship or you don't like them like that

ahhh, i just don't know. i wish i knew how to handle this ...

 

[kazatte]

ahhh, i just don't know. i wish i knew how to handle this ...

i understand :( im so sorry you're going through this. i'm sure you'll figure it out eventually, but don't force yourself to rn; the best way to handle it will come to you