Help I don't recognize myself in the mirror

[Wrath]

Posting in offtopic since this isn't really a question about suicide, rather a weird mirror thing.

When I look in the mirror it feels like whatever is in the reflection isn't me. I don't know what this is called. From what I can remember when I didn't have this weird thing going on it feels like whatever in the mirror isn't there. It's like it got replaced with something else.

My appearance hasn't changed drastically. I don't edit photos of myself or even take photos of myself so it can't be distortion based on that. I see myself in the mirror every morning. But one day it just stopped registering as me a couple months ago I think? I never really thought this would be weird. It feels freaky, like someone is staring at me mirroring my movements.

The only things that I've done is 'practiced' dying to start to chip away at SI. I've also been disconnecting myself from everything. I have no family that cares. I have no friends. I have no relationships past or present. I have no hobbies. I have no favorite videogames. I have no favorite shows. I don't really even know if I have a favorite color anymore. I don't work. I failed highschool. I don't really care for music or tv. I've purposefully burned myself out of everything so I'll have nothing holding me back.
I've done well with getting myself mentally ready. But the one thing that I haven't done is to try to disconnect myself from my appearance. I guess it just happened naturally?

Does anyone else have this?

 

[unluckysadness]

It's called DPDR. I experienced this for the first time when I was around 16 in front of the mirror like you. It's very disturbing. I suffer from physical chronic pain, disabilty (rare diease), all sort of anxiety problems, facial tics, .... but this shit is what scares me the most.
My first advice would be : avoid mirrors if possible. Have a enough sleep. Avoid lights. Close your eyes and rest. Try to think to something else, but rest is the most important thing to do. I'ms sure other people here have experienced this. To be honest, I don't feel comfortable talking about it because my mental health is very bad, but if you google DPDR, you'll find a lot of things about it. I wish you the best. Take care.

 

[Wrath]

Thank you for this. It sounds close to what I'm experiencing.

It's called DPDR. I experienced this for the first time when I was around 16 in front of the mirror like you. It's very disturbing. I suffer from physical chronic pain, disabilty (rare diease), all sort of anxiety problems, facial tics, .... but this shit is what scares me the most.
My first advice would be : avoid mirrors if possible. Have a enough sleep. Avoid lights. Close your eyes and rest. Try to think to something else, but rest is the most important thing to do. I'ms sure other people here have experienced this. To be honest, I don't feel comfortable talking about it because my mental health is very bad, but if you google DPDR, you'll find a lot of things about it. I wish you the best. Take care.

 

[unluckysadness]

Thank you for this. It sounds close to what I'm experiencing.

I've experienced a lot of shitty symptoms in this miserable and painful life and I have other weird symptoms I can't find on internet. But my brain is so fucking weird...