I can't decide what's worse... (to suicide note or not?)

[deeeeejay]

I can't decide whether to leave notes for the important people in my life, one general note or just nothing at all...

Obviously this is something that will be personal to everyone, I get that.

I feel if I don't leave a note, people will think it's an impulsive act. But I feel if I leave notes, people will realise I've had this planned out.

What would be less hurtful to the people in my life? Is it worse to just go without a goodbye? Is it worse that people around me know I've been doing all this behind their back? Would you appreciate receiving a note from your friend, or just nothing?

 

[marinekiwi]

I think it's better to leave a note for the closest one you have, so in the long run they'll be able to understand how you were feeling. Obviously they'll hurt a lot either way, but once they begin to accept loss, the note would help them imo

 

[Lone_Gray_Wolf]

Depends on what your priorities are, not leaving a note opens room for speculation and guessing, which; can be right or completely wrong, you decide if you really care about it. Then a note with barely enough context can clarify, but how much do you want to say? Those are important things too.

Good luck considering which way of proceeding is the best one for you!

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I wrote a short note with the purpose of reducing any guilt/blame my family might feel when I ctb. Don't think anything can be done about the raw pain that comes from the direct attack on their genetic interests.

 

[9kevinngannou]

Depends on who they are really. They're obviously important to you, but how understanding do you feel that they are? I'd appreciate receiving a note from a friend before they'd catch the bus. Maybe more specified notes to certain friends/family members who you hold special to your heart & feel like they'd understand and a general note to the rest?

 

[cambrai33]

I will leave a few notes, really to explain how I kept this hidden and that they couldn't have known to do anything about it. To ask them to think of the good memories which I will mention and that I am free of this torment and at peace finally.

In addition to assure them that I didn't suffer when I passed.

I can't do anything to help with feeling of loss they will feel but I will do all I can through my last true words to them

 

[deeeeejay]

Depends on what your priorities are, not leaving a note opens room for speculation and guessing, which; can be right or completely wrong, you decide if you really care about it. Then a note with barely enough context can clarify, but how much do you want to say? Those are important things too.

Good luck considering which way of proceeding is the best one for you!

I don't want speculation - but I actually think it'd be cruel to tell them that is something I've been planning, without their knowledge, for a while iygm.

Maybe notes with just no comment about the plan / the time period?

 

[FuneralCry]

I think writing a note is better personally, and that is what I plan to do, but only to close family members. I think it may give them some closure if I say things like 'now I am at peace' and 'there is nothing you could have done'. Without a note, they would be left with unanswered questions. I wish you the best.

 

[Biggie]

Personally I will be leaving a note - I think it's important. I don't think it's cruel/hurtful if they gather from it that you've been planning it, it's the reality some of us live in life. If I had to think about this from perspective of someone that doesn't have suicidal tendencies, I think they'd be more confused if a note wasn't left. A note could offer them closure, calm the shock down slightly and help them put less blame on themselves.
It's also an opportunity for you to tell someone something you really want them to know, for them to keep with them after you pass over.

I think you're being really considerate of others and brave for bringing this up

What does your gut tell you?