Discussion How many women are incels?

[getoutgirl]

yippee my weekly incel thread !!
I love these

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Looking for weaker people than me who I can abuse is all I read here. (And also who look exactly like the slave I want, forgot to mention this)

Yeah that sounds very transactional too.
I think more people would have much better luck if they just said "looking for someone to build a life with, we'll figure out all the details later" and then leave it at that. At least it's honest and a lot less mechanical sounding.

 

[Cauliflour]

I think most men would benefit to STUDY BDSM THOROUGHLY because the entire culture revolves around consent. It's not about emotional or romantic bounds with your partner it's about terms and conditions. But I think most men have it in their heads that a woman sleeping with them means they love them or like them respect them etc... nah.

One of my favorite explanations of BDSM goes a little some like the Sub describes the picture she wants colored in and places the boundaries to color in. The Dom decides how to interpret the picture she wants while respecting the boundaries she's put in place. It's about communication and consent. And one thing I really like about the BDSM community is the discussion of limits prior to any intimate act.

Eh, I've never really understood the whole BDSM thing as to me it just looks like roleplaying rape. Then again I'm autistic so the idea of someone intentionally going "stop" multiple times even though they don't mean it really messes with my head as I'm terrified of unintentionally hurting someone. I know it's like a whole umbrella of "sexy pain and latex" but all those rules and bent rules just confuse me really. Then again this is coming from someone who's never even kissed a girl before so feel free to discredit anything I say about sex as it's purely coming from the mind and whatever shit porn taught me.

Looking for weaker people than me who I can abuse is all I read here. (And also who look exactly like the slave I want, forgot to mention this)

I doubt these are the majority, or even a large minority, but I thought it was worth mentioning as it sticks out enough for people to post it on places like r/incelswritingwomen.

yippee my weekly incel thread !!
I love these

I'm just thankful this isn't like Kiwi Farms or 4chan (from what I've gathered)

 

[TheLastGreySky]

yippee my weekly incel thread !!
I love these

You were supposed to bring snacks

 

[Cauliflour]

Yeah that sounds very transactional too.
I think more people would have much better luck if they just said "looking for someone to build a life with, we'll figure out all the details later" and then leave it at that. At least it's honest and a lot less mechanical sounding.

Were people always this future plan-ny or is this a by-product of social media?

 

[getoutgirl]

You were supposed to bring snacks

:3

 

[WhiteRabbit]

yippee my weekly incel thread !!
I love these

May these dudes never get laid

 

[pathetic failure]

The way our brains work are different. A woman venting is not meant to be an absolute statement or an attack on all men. They are working with the assumption that if you are offended then this is about you and if you're not offended then it is not about you.

I get where you're coming from, but realistically...
If all men were terrible, those women generally wouldn't date terrible men... But I'm sure you've met a lot of women who date terrible men.

Someone expressing their experience and history shouldn't offend you, but as a man...
Yeah I get how you see it as towards all men because the subtext is not given to us in context.

You guys actually don't realise the damage words can do. This is not the place to spread hate and say stuff like that. People here are suffering. You can share your experiences without putting a whole gender down. Some of us are actually dying. This is a suicide forum , the majority of people here are men . In unstable mental states ,hating themselves so much words can't describe . Men have feelings too , in fact I have been so hurt by those words I have been crying for hours because they make me feel responsible they make me feel like a rapist and they make me extremely hate myself

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Eh, I've never really understood the whole BDSM thing as to me it just looks like roleplaying rape. Then again I'm autistic so the idea of someone intentionally going "stop" multiple times even though they don't mean it really messes with my head as I'm terrified of unintentionally hurting someone. I know it's like a whole umbrella of "sexy pain and latex" but all those rules and bent rules just confuse me really. Then again this is coming from someone who's never even kissed a girl before so feel free to discredit anything I say about sex as it's purely coming from the mind and whatever shit porn taught me.

It's NOTHING like porn makes it out to be. It's a culture and not a costume. The people who are into GENERALLY tend to have a wider variety of interests when it comes to sex... HOWEVER that's a generalization and isn't a core value whatsoever.

The idea behind BDSM is submission is earned.
The submissive has all the power and simply give permission to the dominant to be in that position.

That's why I said I highly recommend studying it THOROUGHLY. Because it's life changing, unfortunately most people have a terrible impression of it due to movies like Hellraiser

 

[lilurki]

Do you have anxiety around men you don't know?
I don't want to assume anything.

I identify as demi, so I don't fall for someone unless I know they're not putting on a face to get me to like them. Not sure if this is relatable to you, but thought I'd share.

Yes, I just don't trust people in general haha.

I'm also demi, and most people aren't willing to put in the work to get to you know.

 

[littlepup159]

No, it's not really better. Or worse. I wouldn't be able to tell anyway.

I can tell. I am a trans woman. Before transition i was a low testosterone male but still can manage to have sex. It wasn't good bcs i tried to to prove myself how manly I am. Now I am a passing 5'4 girl with pretty face and I can see the difference.

Even though I am so much older I get 16 year old treatment. Yeah I get more hit on but I get inappropriately touched so much more. Yeah men invite me for a drink but I am a stupid young little girl for them. Or some times I get stalked or get sexually harassed. I am so much older so I can manage those situation but still I can't image how would I turn out if I transition earlier. I would probably be rapped or something. (doesn't mean I wouldn't want to transition earlier lol)

 

[TheLastGreySky]

You guys actually don't realise the damage words can do. This is not the place to spread hate and say stuff like that. People here are suffering. You can share your experiences without putting a whole gender down. Some of us are actually dying. This is a suicide forum , the majority of people here are men . In unstable mental states ,hating themselves so much words can't describe . Men have feelings too , in fact I have been so hurt by those words I have been crying for hours because they make me feel responsible they make me feel like a rapist and they make me extremely hate myself

I'm sorry that you feel that way. I agree that people need to be much more selective of their words. However in the matter of incels... Respectfully, most incels are sexist and don't value their "objects" of desire. So frankly they don't deserve the opportunity to abuse their partners because of their ignorance to the wants and needs of the other person involved.

I think you could get a partner at your age without much issue if you took the personal accountability and believed in yourself enough... But understand as much as you hurt at these labels being thrown at our gender... That kind of pain is not comparable to the pain of being SA'd.
So please try to be considerate to why people are shunning you, and their perspective is something I don't think you're taking into account.

 

[Cauliflour]

It's NOTHING like porn makes it out to be. It's a culture and not a costume. The people who are into GENERALLY tend to have a wider variety of interests when it comes to sex... HOWEVER that's a generalization and isn't a core value whatsoever.

The idea behind BDSM is submission is earned.
The submissive has all the power and simply give permission to the dominant to be in that position.

That's why I said I highly recommend studying it THOROUGHLY. Because it's life changing, unfortunately most people have a terrible impression of it due to movies like Hellraiser

Mate my impression is worse because I've never looked up porn of BDSM because I have a feeling it'll disgust me so all my knowledge is just outside things lingering about. Although I suppose that makes it a "better" view as I dread to think how porn shows it.

Is the latex still a core thing or is that just like a sub genre? 'Cause I don't understand how that looks hot, especially when it's really really tight to the point where it highlights everything. I see pictures and drawings and I keep thinking about how these women move in such tight clothing and how much powder it takes to keep the rashes away. I think too practically for the sexy effect to work lol.

 

[getoutgirl]

I'm not even that concerned bout the incel stuff
I mainly love these cos they start off with "I think men issues aren't being taken seriously"
and then you jump to the next page and first thing you read is "...and that's why child slavery..."
I've found them to be endlessly surprising and the entertainment value is just way too high.
Sure I feel for this people, that they were driven here... but I also laugh a lot at the stuff that comes out of some of these. It's great!

 

[Cauliflour]

I can tell. I am a trans woman. Before transition i was a low testosterone male but still can manage to have sex. It wasn't good bcs i tried to to prove myself how manly I am. Now I am a passing 5'4 girl with pretty face and I can see the difference.

Even though I am so much older I get 16 year old treatment. Yeah I get more hit on but I get inappropriately touched so much more. Yeah men invite me for a drink but I am a stupid young little girl for them. Or some times I get stalked or get sexually harassed. I am so much older so I can manage those situation but still I can't image how would I turn out if I transition earlier. I would probably be rapped or something. (doesn't mean I wouldn't want to transition earlier lol)

Something I sometimes think about is how do trans people respond to sexism from their transitioned gender (such as the case here of a trans woman experiencing misogyny)? Because wouldn't that be mixing the feeling of "oh god they're doing this again" with "i'm experiencing girl things!" or am I just stupid? How do those 2 mix together?

I'm not even that concerned bout the incel stuff
I mainly love these cos they start off with "I think men issues aren't being taken seriously"
and then you jump to the next page and first thing you read is "...and that's why child slavery..."
I've found them to be endlessly surprising and the entertainment value is just way too high.
Sure I feel for this people, that they were driven here... but I also laugh a lot at the stuff that comes out of some of these. It's great!

I hope I never start a discussion post with the word "incel" in. If I do then feel free to shoot me without remorse.

 

[TheLastGreySky]

I

Yes, I just don't trust people in general haha.

I'm also demi, and most people aren't willing to put in the work to get to you know.

I feel that. Most people are so self absorbed they're not even willing to talk to someone unless it benefits them in some way. Trust always should be earned.

This site is pretty wild, so many people are from Europe compared to where I'm at (USA), but they all universally seem to share this mentality that no one feels like they do. We're All in This together,
And I believe that... But some of these people be treating life like it's PVP over here

 

[Rynalia]

I identify as demi, so I don't fall for someone unless I know they're not putting on a face to get me to like them. Not sure if this is relatable to you, but thought I'd share.

I'm also demi, and most people aren't willing to put in the work to get to you know.

Muh peepl

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Mate my impression is worse because I've never looked up porn of BDSM because I have a feeling it'll disgust me so all my knowledge is just outside things lingering about. Although I suppose that makes it a "better" view as I dread to think how porn shows it.

Is the latex still a core thing or is that just like a sub genre? 'Cause I don't understand how that looks hot, especially when it's really really tight to the point where it highlights everything. I see pictures and drawings and I keep thinking about how these women move in such tight clothing and how much powder it takes to keep the rashes away. I think too practically for the sexy effect to work lol.

It's not about porn. It's about relationship Dynamics. What people do in the privacy of their own home has nothing to do with how they socially interact publicly and interpersonally.

It's an entire community dedicated to educating about consent and safety. Pornography is literally acting and smut. I'm talking about social and interpersonal relationships... Not adult films

...and then there's child slavery...

Oh my gosh I'm dying over here lol.
There's never a dull moment on SS

 

[littlepup159]

Something I sometimes think about is how do trans people respond to sexism from their transitioned gender (such as the case here of a trans woman experiencing misogyny)? Because wouldn't that be mixing the feeling of "oh god they're doing this again" with "i'm experiencing girl things!" or am I just stupid? How do those 2 mix together?

First time it was obviously cool lol because I felt like a real woman but that's all. All other time it really sucked and felt bad like evey cis woman have experienced this. After I get verbally assaulted from my sexuologist (trans healthcare provider) it It was the final nail in the coffin and I started hate and get scared of all male doctors. I had enough. I learned to be a good girl for those who have authorty over me and are abusive (doctors, teachers) so I could survive in this world.

 

[Cauliflour]

It's not about porn. It's about relationship Dynamics. What people do in the privacy of their own home has nothing to do with how they socially interact publicly and interpersonally.

It's an entire community dedicated to educating about consent and safety. Pornography is literally acting and smut. I'm talking about social and interpersonal relationships... Not adult films

I'll let you have the win on this discussion because I'm just talking out of my ass here and you're obviously some expert. I have no fucking idea how sex actually works and I treat porn like it's a manual which I really hope doesn't fuck anything up in the future regarding my mentality.

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Muh peepl

Uh hey.

 

[pathetic failure]

I'm sorry that you feel that way. I agree that people need to be much more selective of their words. However in the matter of incels... Respectfully, most incels are sexist and don't value their "objects" of desire. So frankly they don't deserve the opportunity to abuse their partners because of their ignorance to the wants and needs of the other person involved.

I think you could get a partner at your age without much issue if you took the personal accountability and believed in yourself enough... But understand as much as you hurt at these labels being thrown at our gender... That kind of pain is not comparable to the pain of being SA'd.
So please try to be considerate to why people are shunning you, and their perspective is something I don't think you're taking into account.

I have been SA'd so I know how it feels but I still don't blame an entire gender. And these are not just labels. If I am a man that I am not able to find a partner and I have the entire society calling me all those names while on top of it feeling so lonely undesirable and unlovable then I'm starting to believe those things myself, maybe I don't have a partner because I don't deserve it , maybe I'm one of these type of men too , maybe I'm responsible for women feeling that way. All of those feelings on top of knowing I will be attempting in 2 months can be insanely damaging. I hope none of you gets to experience this feeling because I can guarantee it's absolutely brutal .

 

[TheLastGreySky]

I'll let you have the win on this discussion because I'm just talking out of my ass here and you're obviously some expert. I have no fucking idea how sex actually works and I treat porn like it's a manual which I really hope doesn't fuck anything up in the future regarding my mentality.

Yeah not going to lie... You're kind of making things really uncomfortable here. Not everything is sexual in nature, and even topics that include sexual themes should be approached respectfully.

Honestly, please for your own safety...
Don't ever try to use wrestling moves in a fight.
Or please don't try to throw a Kamehameha wave.
Reality and media are entirely different.

 

[Cauliflour]

First time it was obviously cool lol because I felt like a real woman but that's all. All other time it really sucked and felt bad like evey cis woman have experienced this. After I get verbally assaulted from my sexuologist (trans healthcare provider) it It was the final nail in the coffin and I started hate and get scared of all male doctors. I had enough. I learned to be a good girl for those who have authorty over me and are abusive (doctors, teachers) so I could survive in this world.

Wait why would your trans healthcare provider verbally assault you? That's terrible business! I hope you ditched them right after that and I'm sorry that you now get to experience the pains of womanhood with us too but I guess that's the double edged sword.

 

[TheLastGreySky]

I get that you're overwhelmed. But one of the hardest things about being a man is you just got to tough it out. No one is going to save you from yourself so if you know you're not some sexual predator... Then why are you getting offended?

 

[Cauliflour]

Yeah not going to lie... You're kind of making things really uncomfortable here.

fuck.

how much? like on a scale of 1-10?

 

[Forever Sleep]

I didn't know the term when I was younger and more interested in guys but yes, I certainly would have identified with the idea of being a femcel. In that I felt like I neither complied in terms of looks, body shape or even attitude- girly, seductive, whatever else that I felt men tended to go for.

Plus, I didn't feel like I'd ever achieve that look/ attitude. Even if I wanted to. I made a solid effort for a couple of years. I was relieved to drop the facade eventually though. I'm much happier without it.

I know there will always be guys who say femcels don't exist. That there will always be a man out there somewhere willing to shaft you basically. Maybe even to give you a try at a proper relationship.

I'd argue for either gender though- it's not necessarily that no one will go out with us. It's more that the people we feel attracted to, won't! I actually doubt all incels would just go out with just anyone. Maybe they would though. Presumably to shaft them, if nothing else.

I've never wanted casual sex anyway. So- that prospect really doesn't do anything for me personally- even if it was true!

When it comes to ideation though, it's not really related so much for me. I certainly went through some very painful years- maybe 13 years. Several bouts of limerence (obsessive crushes on guys.) Feeling desperate to be with them. It was bad, certainly but I don't think that caused or even greatly contributed to my ideation- weirdly.

My cause started with grief and bullying in my childhood but from my late teens onwards, it really was just the grind of life. Work problems, career problems and just feeling worried/ miserable about those prospects.

I expect I did have some hope some guy would 'save me' but, I eventually figured out it was better to drop that fantasy. By the time I reached 40, I think I felt more at peace with being single so, it doesn't really play any part now.

I have noticed it too though. The amount of heart broken or lonely guys here. You'd think traditionally speaking, it would be more women. There are still some women of course.

I guess it depends how much you want that to be a part of your life. How much you need others too I suppose. I've always been a fairly comfortable loner. Now, I actually prefer it. I guess we're all different. I'm relieved to be free of limerence though. That was a total rollercoaster of shit!

 

[lilurki]

I

I feel that. Most people are so self absorbed they're not even willing to talk to someone unless it benefits them in some way. Trust always should be earned.

This site is pretty wild, so many people are from Europe compared to where I'm at (USA), but they all universally seem to share this mentality that no one feels like they do. We're All in This together,
And I believe that... But some of these people be treating life like it's PVP over here

I really like your vibe you seem really thoughtful and considerate :)

 

[TheLastGreySky]

fuck.

how much? like on a scale of 1-10?

Like Pee-wee Herman if he was in an episode of Supernatural.

 

[Cauliflour]

Like Pee-wee Herman if he was in an episode of Supernatural.

I have no idea what this pop culture reference is supposed to mean. Just tell me if I should shut my mouth or not. Be blunt, I'm too stupid to pick up on the hidden meanings.