How quick are you to judge people? How forgiving are you? Do you hold a grudge? What do you expect in return?
I suppose with people I know better, I'll try to overlook the odd spat/ hurtful comment/ action here and there. I probably have a better idea of who I think they are and, whether they really meant it or, whether they're just under pressure or something. I've absolutely needed that favour returned on occassions, where I've snapped at people. I'm really embarassed of some of the things I've said.
There again though, if it's something intentionally or, unintentionally more hurtful, I usually make a mental note not to trust them so much.
With people I've just met now though, I have no tolerance. Any snappyness beyond a heated discussion and, I'll just avoid them. Maybe that's cruel but, it's too triggering and reminiscent of someone in childhood for me.
I'll simply try to avoid people who seem to take easy offence too. Mainly because I don't like offending people! I don't like being made to feel that I have and, I don't enjoy walking on eggshells, being frightened to set them off. Do you consider that cruel? Or, maintaining safe boundaries?
My reasoning is that we're all individuals. I'm sure I piss others off enough for them to dislike or ignore me. There again, there seem like enough people in this world, that we probably all have some we gravitate to more and others, it doesn't hurt to mutually avoid.
I have the other peculiatity in that I enjoy being alone. I don't feel a great need for people in my life so- I'm really picky about who I'm friends with. I wonder if more gregarious people are more open to all personalities.
Do we even have the right to expect others to tolerate or want to be around us? What's your take and approach? Do you try to be friends with all? Do you try to show compassion to those who are more prickly?
I know that's real kindness- to accept all. I've witnessed it in others. I used to have more of it myself but, not so much now. I think because in part, I care less about impressing others. If they take offence easily, they'll likely always be looking to take offence. No matter what our intentions are. Obviously, their motivations to do that may be genuine- prejudices etc. but, I won't even try to reason or please now- most likely. I'll more likely just avoid. Even if that's cruel I suppose.
That's what I find unfortunate though about people who do feel targetted by society. They are sometimes (maybe) understandably more aggressive but then, it's harder to be around people who are on the attack a lot. So- are they as endearing to listen to and support? Morally, we should of course support and listen to them but- we're only human in the less than optimum sense. It's hard to be the hand that gets bitten when it considers feeding.
I suppose with people I know better, I'll try to overlook the odd spat/ hurtful comment/ action here and there. I probably have a better idea of who I think they are and, whether they really meant it or, whether they're just under pressure or something. I've absolutely needed that favour returned on occassions, where I've snapped at people. I'm really embarassed of some of the things I've said.
There again though, if it's something intentionally or, unintentionally more hurtful, I usually make a mental note not to trust them so much.
With people I've just met now though, I have no tolerance. Any snappyness beyond a heated discussion and, I'll just avoid them. Maybe that's cruel but, it's too triggering and reminiscent of someone in childhood for me.
I'll simply try to avoid people who seem to take easy offence too. Mainly because I don't like offending people! I don't like being made to feel that I have and, I don't enjoy walking on eggshells, being frightened to set them off. Do you consider that cruel? Or, maintaining safe boundaries?
My reasoning is that we're all individuals. I'm sure I piss others off enough for them to dislike or ignore me. There again, there seem like enough people in this world, that we probably all have some we gravitate to more and others, it doesn't hurt to mutually avoid.
I have the other peculiatity in that I enjoy being alone. I don't feel a great need for people in my life so- I'm really picky about who I'm friends with. I wonder if more gregarious people are more open to all personalities.
Do we even have the right to expect others to tolerate or want to be around us? What's your take and approach? Do you try to be friends with all? Do you try to show compassion to those who are more prickly?
I know that's real kindness- to accept all. I've witnessed it in others. I used to have more of it myself but, not so much now. I think because in part, I care less about impressing others. If they take offence easily, they'll likely always be looking to take offence. No matter what our intentions are. Obviously, their motivations to do that may be genuine- prejudices etc. but, I won't even try to reason or please now- most likely. I'll more likely just avoid. Even if that's cruel I suppose.
That's what I find unfortunate though about people who do feel targetted by society. They are sometimes (maybe) understandably more aggressive but then, it's harder to be around people who are on the attack a lot. So- are they as endearing to listen to and support? Morally, we should of course support and listen to them but- we're only human in the less than optimum sense. It's hard to be the hand that gets bitten when it considers feeding.
