How do you pick a date?

[aspenjrojas]

I feel like all throughout the year is too close to something important, and I don't wanna be cruel to people I know, if it's close to their birthdays. I was thinking my own birthday, but that also feels cruel like I'm trying to make a statement or point to them and I'm not.

January- maybe? but I love winter and wanna live through it i think
February- 2 family birthdays
March- best friends birthday
April- my birthday?
May- finals season, weird in-between time with a lot going on, also everyone planning for summer
June- start of summer
July- 3 friend & family birthdays
August- 2 family birthdays
September- partners birthday
October- halloween
November- Winter & holiday season starting ish
December- 2 family birthdays & christmas

(woah I have a lot of family i guess)
but yeah, every date i can think of feels too close to something else. My top contender right now is probably either during May or June 1. I just don't know when the best time is.

 

[DignifiedGrave]

Well, eventually theres a point where things like that kind of lose importance. A lot of being suicidal and acquiring capability is burning attachments to life. This happens over a period of time and is different for everyone. Honestly? I would ask "Whats the time i can commit without being discovered or caught?" ask "what is keeping me from commiting the act?" Your day is ultimately all up to you and what you think the best time is. If theres anything you want to do. Id try to cross some things for your list. Could give closure and help you feel like you "did your task".

 

[aspenjrojas]

Thanks, yeah, I guess I may if not anything else, just say "when I feel like it." I think there is still some things I wanna live to do, but I know I don't want to live for too long if its just gonna stay suffering. I guess the only reason I haven't yet is 'just in case', but if nothing changes, I might just do it whenever.

 

[DignifiedGrave]

Thanks, yeah, I guess I may if not anything else, just say "when I feel like it." I think there is still some things I wanna live to do, but I know I don't want to live for too long if its just gonna stay suffering. I guess the only reason I haven't yet is 'just in case', but if nothing changes, I might just do it whenever.

Its always okay to stick around and find ways to learn to enjoy life. You know you can only commit one time and so while maybe not everyone will get better, plenty do, and its okay to be open to that possibility. Suicide is the last thing we should view in terms of "failure and success" outside of preventing unnecessary injury. Its honestly preferable I think if people didnt have to commit out of suffering. You get one go at life so its kind of fucked up that some of us just don't even get to enjoy it. So if you can find a way to like your one time stay on planet earth, that's not a bad thing.