How do adult single men handle the loneliness?

[Kramer]

I feel like I have a black hole within me that constantly desires someone to be with.

I remember a character in The Great Gatsby said upon turning 30, "It's the decade of loneliness."

 

[Good4Nothing]

Same. I have no advise. I'm not handling it well at all. It's why I'm posting on a suicide forum.

 

[StringPuppet]

I pay women on Onlyfans to talk to me

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Much the same as adult, single WOMEN handle the loneliness, I suppose.

 

[Kramer]

Much the same as adult, single WOMEN handle the loneliness, I suppose.

Adult women can have company if they want it. Many men are shit out of luck.

 

[Deleted member 23374]

I keep in mind that my endpoint is set.
barring flying elephants.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Adult women can have company if they want it. Many men are shit out of luck.

How do you work that out? How do we meet this company? Do we walk into a bar on our own? Men can do that, but women can't.

 

[Kramer]

How do you work that out? How do we meet this company? Do we walk into a bar on our own? Men can do that, but women can't.

Just join a dating site and sift through all the guys who message you

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Just join a dating site and sift through all the guys who message you

So why can't men do that? What's the difference?

 

[Kramer]

So why can't men do that? What's the difference?

Go on tinder and be fat. Good looking guys will swipe right guaranteed. That doesn't happen for even average looking men.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Go on tinder and be fat. Good looking guys will swipe right guaranteed. That doesn't happen for even average looking men.

lol you're kiddin' right! I AM that fat, single woman, and there is no way any good looking men will swipe right. Why would they when there are plenty of slim, pretty women on there? Unless these men are 'feeders' of course, or into obese women.

 

[Kramer]

lol you're kiddin' right! I AM that fat, single woman, and there is no way any good looking men will swipe right. Why would they when there are plenty of slim, pretty women on there? Unless these men are 'feeders' of course, or into obese women.

You haven't even tried huh? Good looking guys will often go for anyone. Women on dating apps are very selective, so guys will go for anything. Not me. I keep to my standards

 

[x~Sophia~x]

You haven't even tried huh? Good looking guys will often go for anyone. Women on dating apps are very selective, so guys will go for anything. Not me. I keep to my standards

As you said, "Women on dating apps are very selective," so what makes you think women would meet up with just any man who swipes right for them?

So perhaps it's because you 'keep to your standards' that you're alone?
Try 'dropping your standards slightly, ' after all, beggars can't be choosers...

 

[greebo6]

Not that well.
Its certainly that way for me in terms of general loneliness and I struggle.
Its difficult ,frustrating and it hurts.
But I think loneliness itself is equally difficult and painful for both genders because we are all human and humans don't do well with loneliness.
Same goes for being single when you'd really prefer not to be. (I am that too and it really saddens me sometimes)
Its equally frustrating and painful for both men and women.
I personally don't even try to find love ,relationships or sex because I can't face the inevitable rejection.

 

[summers]

Friends with benefits.

 

[StringPuppet]

Adult women can have company if they want it. Many men are shit out of luck.

Not all company is good company

 

[Disappointered]

Not all company is good company

That is correct. But it's still company which is almost always better than actual solitude.

 

[Kramer]

As you said, "Women on dating apps are very selective," so what makes you think women would meet up with just any man who swipes right for them?

So perhaps it's because you 'keep to your standards' that you're alone?
Try 'dropping your standards slightly, ' after all, beggars can't be choosers...

Chances are that any man you select on tinder will have swiped right on you.

I've lowered them but in public I never have to given the women who can't help but stare. I just can't approach a random in a store. It wouldn't work. I've tried and it's just awkward. I would have to see them regularly.

Online I have dropped them as an experiment and I just cant do it.

 

[ocd is bad]

It's kind of a shame that threads about being single and loneliness end up in arguements about who has it worse. Everyone has their own struggles.

But to answer the question I don't handle it I just let it consume me which is why I'm here.

 

[Disappointered]

@needforrelief do you suffer from socialphobia?

 

[StringPuppet]

That is correct. But it's still company which is almost always better than actual solitude.

I guess. I fall in the solitude camp but I've seen many posts on this very site from people who would have been better off not meeting a partner that hurt them in some way

 

[Disappointered]

I guess. I fall in the solitude camp but I've seen many posts on this very site from people who would have been better off not meeting a partner that hurt them in some way

Yes but those comprise only a small proportion.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Chances are that any man you select on tinder will have swiped right on you.

I've lowered them but in public I never have to given the women who can't help but stare. I just can't approach a random in a store. It wouldn't work. I've tried and it's just awkward. I would have to see them regularly.

Online I have dropped them as an experiment and I just cant do it.

There are no answers, everyone's different, and I wouldn't use Tinder if my life depended on it! It's full of blokes just wanting their leg over!
Plus, it can be very dangerous for women to meet up with strangers. So I'd say it's a lot easier for men to meet women... do you agree?

 

[Kramer]

It's kind of a shame that threads about being single and loneliness end up in arguements about who has it worse. Everyone has their own struggles.

But to answer the question I don't handle it I just let it consume me which is why I'm here.

You have ocd too? It's a life ruiner

@needforrelief do you suffer from socialphobia?

Yeah

 

[Disappointered]

There are no answers, everyone's different, and I wouldn't use Tinder if my life depended on it! It's full of blokes just wanting their leg over!
Plus, it can be very dangerous for women to meet up with strangers. So I'd say it's a lot easier for men to meet women... do you agree?

I personally do not agree. I would say women who are very physically unattractive by current standards are in a pretty terrible spot. The other three quarters or more can meet men just by waiting for a bus. Will it be the kind of men they want to meet? Maybe not but if they just want basic company it's pretty much always available.

 

[Kramer]

There are no answers, everyone's different, and I wouldn't use Tinder if my life depended on it! It's full of blokes just wanting their leg over!
Plus, it can be very dangerous for women to meet up with strangers. So I'd say it's a lot easier for men to meet women... do you agree?

No I don't agree. I've been on all the apps. They used to work but for some reason not anymore. I look the same.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Whatever you say, you really can't generalise. I suffer with social anxiety and BPD. So social anxiety stops me from meeting new people, and BPD means I will inevitably ruin any relationship I have, eventually - so what's the point?
So you see, it doesn't just depend on how easy it is for any gender to be able to form relationships, it also depends on the barriers people have, against meeting people and forming relationships.

No I don't agree. I've been on all the apps. They used to work but for some reason not anymore. I look the same.

Instead of posting a profile picture, if you're rich, post a picture of your bank balance... I'm sure you'll soon see a difference.

 

[ocd is bad]

You have ocd too? It's a life ruiner

I do. I'm sorry that you have it too, it really sucks. For me personally life would be somewhat bearable if it was just ocd but I can't stand the loneliness, that's my main reason.

 

[summers]

Plus, it can be very dangerous for women to meet up with strangers. So I'd say it's a lot easier for men to meet women... do you agree?

Agree 100%. Worst that would happen for me is there's no spark or connection. Maybe I get catfished. If I were to wind up meeting another dude, posing as a woman, I just say that's not my thing and walk away or maybe have a nice dinner and conversation.

Women stand a much higher chance of getting raped or abducted. I don't know what is wrong with men, but some are really fucked in the head.

 

[LastFlowers]

Adult women can have company if they want it. Many men are shit out of luck.

Here we go...this is where the origins of this site rear their ugly head.