C
curiousbeing
I tried everything
- Dec 18, 2022
- 324
I am exactly in the same position . My method is hypothermia , at sea, winter. Increasingly , I don't care about coldness. It's scary how a person gradually changes.I accepted that when I reached adulthood, when I realized that I had failed in many aspects that an average person (or rather average adult) has normally have going and succeeded at. This refers to having stable employment, having a social life, having a SO, and of course, being financially independent. As an adult in my mid 30's now, and having lived more than half my life as an adult, I've accepted that this is the result of my life as it is. I've only kept on mostly due to copes and just biding out my time as having failed in many areas in life, and still living under my parents' roof, but one day (perhaps sooner than later), I will end it all and finally no longer suffer. Once I have accepted that CTB is an option and always on the table, it has fundamentally changed how I view myself as a failure in life; while society, family, and my peers see it as tragedy, I see it as indifference to the result as I'll be dead one day sooner than later (most likely by my own hand).