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The Disqualified

The Disqualified

Disqualified as a Human Being
Feb 4, 2023
152
I feel numb, exhausted, depressed.
 
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nutmacc

nutmacc

Smile
Mar 24, 2026
12
I feel low. No life in me and my neck is sore from partial hanging last night
 
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wannabeangel

wannabeangel

꒰ა Missing Wings ໒꒱
Mar 14, 2026
51
same here, depressed, numb, then also overwhelming emotions at the same time. i keep wanting to be fully numb, im tired of feeling both pain in my body and brain
 
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Dinozauria

Dinozauria

Long sought rest
Feb 8, 2026
105
Moderately alright. I got news that a game series I really like is getting another seven games and the first one is releasing this year :D !! They seem really good quality too. I also decided to treat myself with some snacks, and got to stay in all day, which was nice
I wish I could give you some of the energy I found myself with today 🩷🫂
 
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LonelyPrince

LonelyPrince

Rotten to the Core
Dec 12, 2025
196
Same. I'm tired of this loop.
 
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dreaming

dreaming

sleepy
Feb 11, 2026
67
I feel the exact same as what you described.
I'm too tired to even find things to say anymore.
all I want to do is sleep.
 
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M

Mr. Sadness

Dead inside
Mar 26, 2026
2
Moderately alright. I got news that a game series I really like is getting another seven games and the first one is releasing this year :D !! They seem really good quality too. I also decided to treat myself with some snacks, and got to stay in all day, which was nice
I wish I could give you some of the energy I found myself with today 🩷🫂
Which game series?
 
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INYGTRMTFMO

INYGTRMTFMO

I Need Your Grace To Remind Me To Find My Own
May 1, 2025
204
Drowning in self loathing and at the edge of my capacity to cope with general existence. Thanks for asking, though. I hope you can get some rest and eventually from that some peace and joy.
 
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NotSoEnchanted

NotSoEnchanted

Student
Dec 26, 2025
120
I'm very anxious, I haven't had anxiety like this in years. My SN cleared customs on one end, and is on its way to my country as of today. It should hopefully be here in 7-10 days, but I'm still anxious about it getting seized, lost, and getting a welfare check. I think I'll feel a lot better once it finally arrives, maybe then I'll be able to live life to the fullest until I CTB. But as of now, waiting for this SN is ruining my life even further, it's all I can think about, it's keeping me up at night, along with making me feel physically ill during the day
 
G

gardenhouse

Member
Mar 26, 2026
21
I'm tired of living, i wanna sleep but i can't, I haven't been sleeping for months, every night i only lie in bed but I don't fall asleep because of my hi pitch tinnitus.
 
The Disqualified

The Disqualified

Disqualified as a Human Being
Feb 4, 2023
152
I feel low. No life in me and my neck is sore from partial hanging last night
I hear you. That seems horrible. Here if you wish to talk.
same here, depressed, numb, then also overwhelming emotions at the same time. i keep wanting to be fully numb, im tired of feeling both pain in my body and brain
I hear you. I don't want to be fully numb. I want to feel, but feeling is dangerous. I want happiness like the others have it, but I feel caged.
Moderately alright. I got news that a game series I really like is getting another seven games and the first one is releasing this year :D !! They seem really good quality too. I also decided to treat myself with some snacks, and got to stay in all day, which was nice
I wish I could give you some of the energy I found myself with today 🩷🫂
Thank you for such kind words, truthfully. I am really happy your game series is getting new games soon; I can feel the happiness in your words. That makes me happy as well, truthfully. Today I ate a sweet snack to shoo away my bad feelings, but I don't think that is good practice. Sometimes I've felt a lot of energy recently because of my antidepressant. I hope I can improve. I feel better since yesterday. Wishing you the best.
Same. I'm tired of this loop.
I hear you. Both of us.
I feel the exact same as what you described.
I'm too tired to even find things to say anymore.
all I want to do is sleep.
I hear you. I hope you have a good sleep tonight if anything.
Drowning in self loathing and at the edge of my capacity to cope with general existence. Thanks for asking, though. I hope you can get some rest and eventually from that some peace and joy.
Self loathing really is addictive sometimes, especially when you are already in a bad mental space.
I need to rest. I need to wake up properly. My sleep is all over the place, but much better than in the past. I wish you a rest and, from that, joy as well, truthfully.
Existence can be tiring. Here if you wish to talk.
I'm very anxious, I haven't had anxiety like this in years. My SN cleared customs on one end, and is on its way to my country as of today. It should hopefully be here in 7-10 days, but I'm still anxious about it getting seized, lost, and getting a welfare check. I think I'll feel a lot better once it finally arrives, maybe then I'll be able to live life to the fullest until I CTB. But as of now, waiting for this SN is ruining my life even further, it's all I can think about, it's keeping me up at night, along with making me feel physically ill during the day
I hear you. I feel horrible anxiety in social interactions. It really is dreadful to feel like that.
I got my SN 2 years ago or so. In my country, no one really bothers; it is pretty easy to get one. I would try clearing my mind of this in your situation. Not good to lose your sleep over it. I hope everything ends up fine for you. Ordering SN is a big decision. I hope you reflect about it and your choice. Sending you best wishes.
 
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T

thelostautistic

Experienced
Jul 31, 2025
287
I'm really struggling at the moment. My endometriosis symptoms are getting worse and nothing I do helps. I'm so fed up of fighting everything I deal with everyday. I don't want to be here anymore😞
 
The Disqualified

The Disqualified

Disqualified as a Human Being
Feb 4, 2023
152
I'm tired of living, i wanna sleep but i can't, I haven't been sleeping for months, every night i only lie in bed but I don't fall asleep because of my hi pitch tinnitus.
That just seems like a horrible situation to be in. I am sorry you are suffering so much. Having tinnitus and losing sleep over it must be horrible; I can't imagine. Is there anything doctors can do to help you? I really hope you can improve and get sleep back. Sleep is extremely important, as I found out the hard way. I hope you improve. Sending best wishes.
 
G

gardenhouse

Member
Mar 26, 2026
21
That just seems like a horrible situation to be in. I am sorry you are suffering so much. Having tinnitus and losing sleep over it must be horrible; I can't imagine. Is there anything doctors can do to help you? I really hope you can improve and get sleep back. Sleep is extremely important, as I found out the hard way. I hope you improve. Sending best wishes.
Thank you, yes. I know sleep is very important, who doesn't sleep, it doesn't only refresh your body but also reset you brain.

Unfortunately, doctors can't help, tinnitus has no cure, i used sleeping pills but no longer work as my body is used to it now.


That's why i've been suicidal because sleeplessness doesn't kill you but i'm not surviving well, as someone who used to love to sleep, i missed my old sleep so much before the tinnitus happened. I've been using white noise to sleep but still my brain just doesn't shut down because i'm a light sleeper even before the tinnitus happened to me, I didn't need any kind of sound to sleep, i loved silence and slept in silence.

I never felt depressed before, had a wonderful life with my husband and i loved every moment of it, then T happened to me and completely changed my life 360 degree, and I'm depressed, have low mood every day and I can't do it anymore…when everyone is asleep I'm awake, and i still have to function, go to work and again trapped in vicious cycle of not being able to sleep, i wanna end my life seriously.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
47,743
No matter what I'll just always find it so torturous to suffer in this terrible, dreadful, torturous and painful existence I just always saw as a mistake, in this existence so harmful that just tortures existing beings with no limit as to how much agony one can feel non-existence is just the only peace for me.

I'll only be at peace once I'm permanently free from the torture of existing, for me non-existence is just all that's positive, for me ceasing to exist would be the positive solution to find peace from the evil of existing where existing beings are in agony every second. No matter what this existence should never be imposed and it's so terrible how it was causing all this torture, cruelty and suffering as a result, I always suffer so much from being trapped in this horrific world where humans have made it illegal to cease existing painlessly with the suffering and torture of this terrible, dreadful existence seen as to force and prolong no matter what.
 
T

thehorizons

Member
Mar 25, 2026
15
Not good. I have post-acute withdrawal syndrome (PAWS) and it's affecting my ability to sleep (e.g. I'll have adrenaline surges when I nap or when I wake up in the morning). Besides that I have skin cancer as well. I think that my PAWS will resolve one day, but if my skin cancer consumes me or if I have other diseases in the near future before that happens, I'll have to be largely awake experiencing the pain.

I was feeling better recently when I was researching Night-Night and SN, but I'm kind of down now since I don't think both methods would work for me. The former because it's technically hard to pull off and not without risks. The latter because I can't take any anti-emetics nor benzos due to my PAWS reacting negatively with these medications.
 
nitrogenous

nitrogenous

Just wanna break free of all suffering
Dec 26, 2025
219
I feel so stressed out and hopeless as I am close to being homeless and getting deported, yet there is no help for me at all. Also the fact that my medical team kept on reinforcing how "no one can help you" "no one will understand you" is just... devastating. I am also meant to pay $900 for a new psychiatrist next week, and was told that I would lose my other medical supports otherwise. Honestly, I feel like maybe I should really just not go as I can't afford it and plus losing these "supports" might actually open doors to new people, support and resources that actually care about me and not see me as a "manipulative, attention seeking" person...
 
K

kk13

Member
Feb 2, 2026
90
Im not okay. I only want to die. Thats the only thing i want from this life
 

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