hihi2027's journal

[hihi2027]

Hello. This is just a journal for before I commit ctb. You can read it if you want but it wont be interesting to read. I'm not a good writer and I'm a very boring person, so keep that in mind.

I am going to use this to I guess track my life up until the final moment of my life. I dont really have a goal in mind. I guess I just want to have something down on text for my own reminder. Plus any thoughts or rambles I have at the time.


So what about me? My interests include video games and ambient music. I am a big fan of Mount Shrine which I think you should definetly check out.

I used to have dreams I guess. Growing up always wanted to either draw or develop games. But realized that those markets just dont pay enough to be worth it.

Is there anything I want to do before I ctb? I did use to have a list of, 2, projects. Some fan games that I wanted to make of my favorite game franchises of all time. But I've come to realize that I do not have the talent or skill to make them into reality. And I also know that no one would play them either, or if they did, they would realize they are crap...

I do feel like I dont really belong on on here. A lot of you guys seem like you have it way worst than me yet here I am complaining about my b####### problems. I guess that just means I deserve to die and be forgotten forever.

I know I wont be missed. And before you say it, sure, family would be sad. But, let's say a month passes.. They will forget about me. This is how it is though.

Do I have any goals before ctb? No. All I have are conditions. I must be alone when I ctb. Right now I am in parent house so ctb is not feasible right now. Also broke and a college drop out, so job prospects are in the ####. Only thing I can think of is getting into the trades. I am at least lucky enough that this is an option. That's basically the only option right now. It's just a matter of finding one with the least amount of schooling or certifications, and, then just save up until I can afford the means to ctb.

I would like to ctb somewhere private. Like, completely private. My perfect spot would be somewhere in the mountains in a cabin. Totally isolated and free from any interruptions.

If you have any suggestions then feel free to let me know? If you know an easy path for me to take let me know.

 

[Dissolving Figment]

Why trades? Why not a shitty job like fast food or whatever?

 

[hihi2027]

Why trades? Why not a shitty job like fast food or whatever?

Hello and thanks for replying


Idk if im being honest with you. Everyone tells me that that what dropouts end up doing, trades or fast food, but doesnt the former make more money? Plus im pretty sure the physical labour makes you die faster, so theres that. But most importantly, im trying to become alone, not live with roommates, or a girlfriend, or a friend, or a wife, just alone. Is fastfood enough to do that? Thats what Im thinking long term. What else is going to pay for a cheap room? In the meantime, any other job is just saving up for a cheap car so i can move out of parents and never look back... But, i dont really know what im talking about here ^^;
anyway thanks again for replying

 

[Dissolving Figment]

Hello and thanks for replying


Idk if im being honest with you. Everyone tells me that that what dropouts end up doing, trades or fast food, but doesnt the former make more money? Plus im pretty sure the physical labour makes you die faster, so theres that. But most importantly, im trying to become alone, not live with roommates, or a girlfriend, or a friend, or a wife, just alone. Is fastfood enough to do that? Thats what Im thinking long term. What else is going to pay for a cheap room? In the meantime, any other job is just saving up for a cheap car so i can move out of parents and never look back... But, i dont really know what im talking about here ^^;
anyway thanks again for replying

Yeah, trades is a lot more money, but if youre just trying to save up for a bit then fast food will get you the money faster.

Generally a shitty entry level job is enough to afford a shitty place but money would be tight, if you're trying to get a car and move out then trades is the smarter long term plan. Just didn't seem like long term is what you were going for.

Also I'm sorry but "im pretty sure the physical labour makes you die faster" is an absolutely hilarious concern given the context

 

[hihi2027]

Also I'm sorry but "im pretty sure the physical labour makes you die faster" is an absolutely hilarious concern given the context

No one understands me. I'm done posting here. All my threads are an embrassment.