Hi everyone, I'm new here and want to share my story trying to get N and backup method

[bodrioirredento]

To make my story short.... i been feeling suicidal from 20 years now, with ups and downs, but this past monts have been a nightmare and i think, that's enough, and its time for me to CTB....

For the first time in my life im actively looking for methods and found this site and the PPH.

I don't want to make a mess in my journey, i want to go in a peacefull way alone, with no disturbance to society, that's why i don't throw myself from a bridge, under a bus or the train tracks or blow my head in the apartment I'm renting.
I am from the country that have reputation, of selling N easily, but for me has been a big NO, i been searching for a couple months, traveling to diferent states and small towns, cities, and dangerous places looking for a vet that agrees to sell but no luck, i think that is in the past.

I also try to contact A from a secure mail account and no answer from him

Currently im trying to get SN, today I contact a local seller that told me that they sell but i vale to order it an wait some time to arrive.

This is not my preferred method to go, because the time to make it work is going to drive me crazy. But it is what it is.

I will share my methods and my thoughts when i get the SN to hear about your opinions

 

[wereqryan]

SN is fairly easy to get. I am currently collecting DDMA lethal cocktail drugs but I'm stuck on Morphine. I will get SN soon. My fear with both these methods is the vomiting. I don't want to vomit in out and then end up with organ damage in the hospital and then the psychiatric ward. I'm also looking into hypoxic death with nitrogen cylinder and scuba diving mask. However this method has a complicated setup and I fear I could end up with brain damage.

 

[Symbiote]

Hi and welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, sorry you're here with us. If you're in that particular country where N was readily available through veterinarian clinics, that has been quelled by the government because they didn't want to their country to be the face of suicide tourism. Getting is really hard and most veterinarians will not sell to you to avoid having their license taking away or end up in jail for selling it to someone who has other motives than pets.

SN is still easy to acquire unless you're the UK. Most butcher or meat processing facilities have them to use as a preservative. They have them pre-mixed with other curative agents in the form of Prague Powder (Pink Powder) which contains only 6-18% SN. The lab-grade ones are behind a chemical supplier paywall in which you'll need a business license to procure. Whether food grade or lab-grade, you can get SN purity of 95% or greater. The resource wiki that's stickied at the top of this forum has more information.

 

[LifeQuitter2018]

I also try to contact A from a secure mail account and no answer from him

Try contacting seller D. A has been down for a month.

 

[bodrioirredento]

SN is fairly easy to get. I am currently collecting DDMA lethal cocktail drugs but I'm stuck on Morphine. I will get SN soon. My fear with both these methods is the vomiting. I don't want to vomit in out and then end up with organ damage in the hospital and then the psychiatric ward. I'm also looking into hypoxic death with nitrogen cylinder and scuba diving mask. However this method has a complicated setup and I fear I could end up with brain damage.

I know that feeling, end up with brain damage, is more terrifying than CTB, but If you follow the antiemetic and fastinng recommendations in this forum I don't think you vomit. The exit bag sounds great but, as you say is more complex to do, specially if you're going to check in a hotel room as I'm going to do it. At least with SN I'm just going to look like a smurf, and if my relatives decide to give a funeral that can be fixed with some makeup. Thank you for read and answer!

 

[wereqryan]

I know that feeling, end up with brain damage, is more terrifying than CTB, but If you follow the antiemetic and fastinng recommendations in this forum I don't think you vomit. The exit bag sounds great but, as you say is more complex to do, specially if you're going to check in a hotel room as I'm going to do it. At least with SN I'm just going to look like a smurf, and if my relatives decide to give a funeral that can be fixed with some makeup. Thank you for read and answer!

Yeah there's just no easy solution for dying. Hope everything works out for you.

 

[bodrioirredento]

Try contacting seller D. A has been down for a month.

Thank you for the advice

avoid having their license taking away or end up in jail for selling it to someone who has other motives than pets.

You're right I have to tell a story that I have a dying pet, actually I cried a little, I have luck with one to agree to sell me 3ml in a used syringe, and I know that was not enough for me. But I will keep trying, thank you for your welcoming message.