Hi guys,
Ok so I have a few questions and mixed thoughts I wanted to share.
Is there a thread somewhere for the actual "equipment" for Stans method.
Like what to bring with you to the hotel or whatever like a checklist. I'm worried I'll be super anxious before hand and/or be travelling quite far.
Does anyone else also keep overthinking it. I keep feeling bad (this is just like other sides of life) that I'm not leaving enough time to write "really good" letters/emails, donate my body to science, reading the SS forum for similar ideas… like I'm putting loads of pressure on myself to make it "perfect" (typical me).
Also, I was feeling really bad and guilty about it and getting in my head a lot. A friend was shaming about CTB so I felt bad but then another friend really was nice and understanding. It made me see that I was just being way too anxious and guilty, loads of other people would've just done it and that basically there was nothing wrong with my reasoning. I'm afraid of leaving that state though, or losing my nerve - especially if I'm alone for ages.
I don't know how to handle the next while. I have a bit of time (a few weeks, maybe more until I need to do things IRL). I haven't booked a place yet. I don't have any plans and don't work currently, and should CTB soon before things get worse. I'm also aware if I isolate myself I'm just going to feel like I'm in "lockdown" again which also fuelled my depression before. But many of my friends no longer talk to me or are busy… it's difficult and I don't know how to spend the next few weeks. My living situation is also not great. I don't have much space to myself and don't live with people I know well.
I'm not great at looking after myself. Like today, I just sat on this forum a lot, didn't make many future plans / any, and didn't even relax alone.
Also, I keep feeling sort of "fake" around the friends that I do see, pretending things are okay when they're not and that makes me feel even worse. It was such a relief to be honest with my friend today
TLDR: I want to keep myself in a good mind frame for the next while, just so that I am focused and well when I do go and CBT. Any thoughts are welcome.
Ok so I have a few questions and mixed thoughts I wanted to share.
Is there a thread somewhere for the actual "equipment" for Stans method.
Like what to bring with you to the hotel or whatever like a checklist. I'm worried I'll be super anxious before hand and/or be travelling quite far.
Does anyone else also keep overthinking it. I keep feeling bad (this is just like other sides of life) that I'm not leaving enough time to write "really good" letters/emails, donate my body to science, reading the SS forum for similar ideas… like I'm putting loads of pressure on myself to make it "perfect" (typical me).
Also, I was feeling really bad and guilty about it and getting in my head a lot. A friend was shaming about CTB so I felt bad but then another friend really was nice and understanding. It made me see that I was just being way too anxious and guilty, loads of other people would've just done it and that basically there was nothing wrong with my reasoning. I'm afraid of leaving that state though, or losing my nerve - especially if I'm alone for ages.
I don't know how to handle the next while. I have a bit of time (a few weeks, maybe more until I need to do things IRL). I haven't booked a place yet. I don't have any plans and don't work currently, and should CTB soon before things get worse. I'm also aware if I isolate myself I'm just going to feel like I'm in "lockdown" again which also fuelled my depression before. But many of my friends no longer talk to me or are busy… it's difficult and I don't know how to spend the next few weeks. My living situation is also not great. I don't have much space to myself and don't live with people I know well.
I'm not great at looking after myself. Like today, I just sat on this forum a lot, didn't make many future plans / any, and didn't even relax alone.
Also, I keep feeling sort of "fake" around the friends that I do see, pretending things are okay when they're not and that makes me feel even worse. It was such a relief to be honest with my friend today
TLDR: I want to keep myself in a good mind frame for the next while, just so that I am focused and well when I do go and CBT. Any thoughts are welcome.
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