Venting Funerals are weird and awkward

[fallingbehind]

Its just so odd and awkward. Having an open casket funeral so multiple people can sit around and gawk at the body, if you come from a religious country like I do, every speech is just rife with delusional religious platitudes, etc.

Whats even weirder is that we are in an era that encourages livestreaming and posting funerals. My uncle just passed away and my family sent me a link to watch his funeral, is that not invasive? Literally anybody can watch that if they desired. Should it not a private event?

Im going to request to not have a funeral, but there is a chance my parents ignore my request and do it anyway. For some reason, even though ik I will be too dead to care, I cant handle the thought that random people (or family members that I fucking despise) will be able to see my ugly face made uglier with all the liquid they pump into your corpse to look "presentable".

Why should people that either didnt care about me, or treated me like shit get to see me in that manner? Why should I, someone who is staunchly anti-religion, be made a spectacle with some priest talking about how Im with God or whatever (even though suicide is a sin)?

Smh.

 

[TBONTB]

Appreciate your vent.

 

[MissAbyss]

Why should people that either didnt care about me, or treated me like shit get to see me in that manner? Why should I, someone who is staunchly anti-religion, be made a spectacle with some priest talking about how Im with God or whatever (even though suicide is a sin)?

They do that here too, I've never understood it. Most people just come out of curiosity, like watching a monkey at the zoo. I actually find it quite distasteful.

 

[LetMeOut67]

I don't know about anywhere else but direct cremation is apparently now the majority option in the UK
There'd be hardly anyone at my funeral so it's just aswell I won't be having one

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm such a mess at funerals. I always end up bawling my eyes out. I haven't been to one with an open casket- fortunately but, we did go to see my Grandma in the chapel of rest. It was a very strange experience. I suppose it helps with closure in some way. Family members or friends that I haven't attended the funeral of sometimes felt a bit more limbo. Like, I'd somehow not quite believe they had gone and had to keep reminding myself.

I'm not sure about them being filmed. I didn't attend an Aunt's funeral more recently. My family are hundreds of miles away. But, I watched it via a link. It was kind of nice to be able to do that. But yeah- it does seem more intrusive if just anyone can watch. Especially if it's an open casket.

If I can hold on till my Dad goes, I'll arrange a direct cremation too. I don't want people to feel the burden of travelling hundreds of miles for some dry service. I know the person who takes the service usually tries to make it personal but, it always feels weird to me. I think they are more open to not making it massively religious now. Some I've been to sounded like a sermon on how and how not to get into heaven! I also doubt many would go to mine either so- it would be a waste really.

 

[DarkRange55]

 

[Pluto]

 

[IDontKnowEverything]

Most people just come out of curiosity, like watching a monkey at the zoo.

Not going to lie, this reminds me of the end of Albert Camus'es "the Stranger".
The following I copy-pasted from somewhere near the end.

"When such thoughts crossed my mind, I remembered a story Motherused to tell me about my father. I never set eyes on him. Perhaps the onlythings I really knew about him were what Mother had told me. One of thesewas that he'd gone to see a murderer executed. The mere thought of itturned his stomach. But he'd seen it through and, on coming home, wasviolently sick. At the time, I found my father's conduct rather disgusting.But now I understood; it was so natural. How had I failed to recognize thatnothing was more important than an execution; that, viewed from oneangle, it's the only thing that can genuinely interest a man? And I decidedthat, if ever I got out of jail, I'd attend every execution that took place."

This book, thinking about it, is one I would recommend to most people on this website. I think many would find themselves in it to a point, and possibly find it cathartic.