ImmortalTaoist
Member
- Nov 10, 2020
- 34
To be honest I can across this thru Reddit and well idk how to describe my feelings really. I've never really cared for myself, and well even now that I'm in a relationship I've tried I really have but even then she mentioned that it's become too much because I always bring this or that up, being my past and traumas.... I believed I was changing and that I was doing better but in reality I've just been lying to myself like I always have, that I've just been giving myself and my all to someone that I love without caring much for myself and focusing my life for them. It's always been like that. Despite knowing what I like and enjoy, despite knowing what I want to do in life, what I love, what goals I have and all these things and opportunities I can't find myself to be happy. I was loving this girl and I still love her but in the end, just like my father and just how my mother almost did, she's probably gonna leave me. Just like my stepfather, my friends and like everyone, she's bound to leave at this rate and I'll end up alone as I always have been. I've always felt like my life, my goals and what I wish and want never aligned with this world, with this technology, as much as I love it, and just with this all as it is. I feel restrained, I feel empty, I feel worthless, and I feel nothing idk... I just wish to go peacefully and start anew
