Feel sad.... nostalgic i dunno.

[Busridin'26]

When my life goes through so many changes I have a habit of clinging onto past things that felt "good". This time around I really had no want to be clinging to anything of this past year or so.


2018 was so peak traumatic I sometimes forget it in my timeline. The last how many yrs have been really bad. Really lonely.

My dreams are making me do it anyways and it's sad

A lot of things in my life are sad. I feel like for a bit I haven't had the luxury and won't really for a bit??? To think about death in turns of really dying... like...

I'm making room for alot of changes to happen in my life right now and it's kinda tiring me out.

I always doubt if I'd teally be able to do it. What feelings would I really need have or cultivate at the time....

 

[SugarbushMtn]

I do the same, relive old memories to feel better. I dont really know if there is anything wrong with that? Better than drugs or ctb.. It helps so I do it. Old music, old movies, old friends, all represent the best times and make me feel better. Probably not 100% healthy to do but better than the alternatives.

 

[Busridin'26]

I guess I just have no real tragedy to cling on yo and I'm in a completely transition rn... so my brain feels almost lost but is isn't.

I just feel sad at the quality even of my nostalgia. It's been yes since I've felt supported. It's been yes since I've felt so lonely I can't think about it too much.

I wonder if things could change and I'm not sure if I still ever wanna be here for it. I've made up my mind but I wonder if I'll be able to ever overcome fear.