Venting Failed attempts

[soiledpot33]

I was going to comment on another post but thought I would just start another.
It's so hard to finally get to the attempt where you are serious and ready, there's no worse feeling than failing. You've Already failed at so much, it sucks to fail at yet another thing. I've tried major attempts, and my body just finds a way to survive, it's infuriating. I sometimes feel like Bruce Willis in unbreakable because my 4 attempts were so solid, at least in my mind, that I can't believe I'm alive. I'm afraid to keep trying because I'm lucky to not be a vegetable and i feel like that's going to be my destiny. This is my first post here, but I've been here for a while. I wish you could just take a pill and go to sleep, it's cruel that you can't. I need to find my method that will work, and I hope to find my peace. It just is so hard to fail and keep going. Thanks for the venting!!

 

[Anonymousa]

Yea failed attempts can suck so much with how much effort and energy you put in them to not get the result you desired. Know you shouldn't at all feel ashamed for it. Suicide is the one of the hardest things to do with our own biology going against us and the restriction of better methods cus of stupid pro-lifers not realizing preventing suffering is more important than preserving life. Hope you find a way out your pain with a better method or some how getting better <3

 

[kagebunshin]

Yep failing a genuine and wholehearted suicide attempt is crushing. I really feel for you having failed numerous times. From my own experience, the human body doesn't die easy, and please remember that failing isn't a personal failure but is just circumstance. I'm also being careful to prepare for my next attempt so that I won't fail again. Best of luck to you.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's just so cruel to me as well how the option to just peacefully cease existing is denied with suffering seen as to force and prolong no matter what as all I hope for is a peaceful, guaranteed death with no more pain and no more suffering and I find it horrific how trying to cease existing can go wrong and lead to way worse agony. It's just terrifying to me how there is no limit as to how much a human can suffer in this painful, torturous existence, I'd never wish for any of this rather all I wish for is to never suffer ever again, I hope that you find peace.