Doing what is right for others at the expense f caring for yourself

[Water-Lily]

This sounds counter intuitive but just hear me out

I was part of chat for a long time on and off. I pop in a bit but refuse to participate. Not because of anyone, but because of myself. I have been rude to people lately and I feel its better off if I am not around. I heard the notion of "one having the right to take up space" by a life coach friend a while back. That when one has been abused they feel burdensome when going into spaces feeling as if they do not belong because they were raised to think they didn't;t matter. In my case I genuinely don't matter. I matter to no one. My behavior have caused such pain I feel its best for everyone if I run away or just leave. Everyone will understand eventually

 

[fishtacos4me]

oh I can relate.
Just a small example: I was trying to figure out how to get my cat's teeth cleaned when my wife pointed out that I haven't had mine cleaned. If not for her, I wouldn't have even thought about my own teeth. I would have just gotten the cat done and never given it another thought.

I have a home office and I'm rarely out of it. Family complains that I live my whole life in one room. It's where I work, where I play, where I watch movies, where I keep my fish, where I eat, where I make coffee. I'm comfortable here and when I'm not here I want to come back here. I wonder if I'm still trying to not take up any space.