does anyone else struggle with this?

[iftheworldwasending]

i normally have a few days to a week where i'm doing pretty decent, and then i'll be struggling really bad again, but these past two weeks have been different.
this last week i was the happiest i've probably ever been in my life. i actually cried thinking about how suicidal i was and how seriously i planned my suicide. i thought i had finally made it to the good and happy part of my life, figured out the right vitamins, right medicine, etc. then yesterday, it got bad again. i'm so defeated because i have never been that elated or content in my life and i genuinely hoped it would stay that way. but now, i'm here back on this site.

does this happen to anyone else? has anyone else ever experienced this?

 

[Passersby]

Hi if the world was ending,
Yes I would be ok with that too. I can somewhat relate however I haven't had the high, and not so distant happiness that you talk about in a long , long, time. I can relate to the effort and hopes of climbing out of a hole only to fall back in though. Cycling. You do everything you can but it's never enough. Ctb is all I have. I'm glad we have this site. :). Is there any way you can make it stay good for you? The ups and downs are exhausting. :(. Are you able to continue with whatever works for you in those few moments of joy?

 

[BandAddict]

All feelings are temporary, and that can be good or bad, unfortunately. That sounds awesome that you were able to figure some stuff out, but I'm sorry you're facing the comedown. One thing to take away is that feeling that way is possible! It means that it's not like you're unable to feel good or happy or content. On the other hand, I find that feeling good can make feeling bad feel worse, so I empathize with you.

I do experience days where I'm "okay". I don't have meltdowns and I get a lot done, I laugh, joke around and I can act goofy, but it doesn't last. However, I haven't felt actually content with my life in a long time, so that experience is fuzzy to me. I'm always actively or passively suicidal, happy in the moment or not.

 

[WornOutLife]

Well, I suffer from bipolar disorder so, it happens to me all the time.
I'm currently living in hell and heaven.

 

[fred farkle]

Nope. My feelings are pretty constant. Im worse at work,and better when itts over,but basically the same.Shit! I envy you,I think you cando it,you can save your life!