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failedmind

failedmind

Student
Oct 31, 2024
101
I have PMDD and it makes me extremely suicidal.
I'm already very suicidal, but the two ish weeks before my period, I get so insanely suicidal that I wake up in the middle of the night almost every night in a complete panic that I can't CTB right that second (still in the process of getting SN and everything ready).
Its debilitating. I know I will most likely CTB during this time. It's like I have little to no SI because I just feel so ready to go.
Was just wondering if anyone else has this and if they relate.
 
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OhSoTired

Member
Sep 11, 2021
11
I do. I've often wondered how many women on here also suffer from PMDD.
 
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LittleNelson

LittleNelson

Member
Dec 18, 2021
43
I have PMDD but I don't know how much of it is responsible for my depression/suicidal thoughts. My hormones have always been messed up and I've suffered with acne and weight gain. It certainly makes life more difficult.
 
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SchrodingerIsDed

SchrodingerIsDed

Arcanist
Feb 17, 2025
416
Well hey at least you know when it's coming. That's something. And one might even view it as a benefit if they planned to ctb. Getting rid of the SI in advance, I wish I could have that. My SI is really strong.

That said, I don't know the impact of the hormone shift you ladies go through. Even the normal ones seem to be impactful. Much less harsh ones. I can't imagine the intensity.

If you're looking for a cure, do you do Yogic breathing at all? I don't know how much that would help. Or CBD products or benzos?
 
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ConfusedClouds

Arcanist
Mar 9, 2024
460
Well hey at least you know when it's coming
Sadly life has too many variables for hormones and reactions and symptoms to be successfully tracked/predicted (and thus mitigated or prepared for) even if the bleeding itself seems to be regular for the time being. The other symptoms seem so variable. Makes me question it all and doubt. And feel very incompetent as an adult to not 'know myself'. Thats my experience.
 
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SchrodingerIsDed

SchrodingerIsDed

Arcanist
Feb 17, 2025
416
Sadly life has too many variables for hormones and reactions and symptoms to be successfully tracked/predicted (and thus mitigated or prepared for) even if the bleeding itself seems to be regular for the time being. The other symptoms seem so variable. Makes me question it all and doubt. And feel very incompetent as an adult to not 'know myself'. Thats my experience.
Well it is complicated and a lot of variables and even normal cycles can fluctuate randomly, too, right, or based on any number of life changes. You shouldn't feel incompetent for not being able to predict it.

They have apps and maybe AI can help figure out if there's any common denominator leading to triggering the worst of it? You could log diet, feelings, patterns, sleep, etc, etc and maybe AI could help put the pieces together?

In any case, I know that's still rough. I feel for you all. :( Is there anything in the moment that helps?