DID AND DYING

[lyralynn]

Anyone else have a dissociative disorder and have complicated thoughts about dying when parts and alters have different thoughts and desires on living? Some parts of me desperately want to live, some(more) are exhausted living this way and then some innocent, small alters don't even know what suicide is. Is it fair for one to make the decision for the body?

 

[LongJacks]

Anyone else have a dissociative disorder and have complicated thoughts about dying when parts and alters have different thoughts and desires on living? Some parts of me desperately want to live, some(more) are exhausted living this way and then some innocent, small alters don't even know what suicide is. Is it fair for one to make the decision for the body?

I don't have dissociative disorder but I do feel wanting for everything to just end already while still having hope for a bright future, it's frustrating... certain life choices are hard to balance

 

[ScarletTanager]

Same feeling here, always weighing life and death, teeter-tottering between both. It's your life to carefully consider, it depends how you feel about your life and what your death ultimately would mean to you.

 

[lyralynn]

Same feeling here, always weighing life and death, teeter-tottering between both. It's your life to carefully consider, it depends how you feel about your life and what your death ultimately would mean to you.

Yeah i guess but it's complicated when what constitutes death and life means something different to each part. Would it be fair for me to die when it's not just me in my body? Why would one person get to make the decision for the whole body...

I don't have dissociative disorder but I do feel wanting for everything to just end already while still having hope for a bright future, it's frustrating... certain life choices are hard to balance

Definitely very hard to balance especially when fighting to decide what a bright or even okay future looks like differs so much between each alter.

 

[Kokonoe]

Anyone else have a dissociative disorder and have complicated thoughts about dying when parts and alters have different thoughts and desires on living? Some parts of me desperately want to live, some(more) are exhausted living this way and then some innocent, small alters don't even know what suicide is. Is it fair for one to make the decision for the body?

i think i get what you mean. i do think all of us want to die. but we've always taken some level of preventive measure every time we would attempt as like some sort of "safety net", even though it makes no sense to do so and we don't really want to. like not doing methods that are too risky, or telling people we're close with about it pre-attempt. my oldest sister insists it's because some part of us doesn't want to die and that's why we keep getting in our on way every time. i don't know if i really agree. but either way it's really frustrating.
and i don't really know about if it's like, morally okay for one of us to make a decision for the whole system or not. it is sort of scary to know we could just get killed by one of our alters on impulse, i guess. but at least for us, we're pretty unanimous on wanting to die, so it's not really an issue.

 

[lyralynn]

i think i get what you mean. i do think all of us want to die. but we've always taken some level of preventive measure every time we would attempt as like some sort of "safety net", even though it makes no sense to do so and we don't really want to. like not doing methods that are too risky, or telling people we're close with about it pre-attempt. my oldest sister insists it's because some part of us doesn't want to die and that's why we keep getting in our on way every time. i don't know if i really agree. but either way it's really frustrating.
and i don't really know about if it's like, morally okay for one of us to make a decision for the whole system or not. it is sort of scary to know we could just get killed by one of our alters on impulse, i guess. but at least for us, we're pretty unanimous on wanting to die, so it's not really an issue.

Most of the alters I know about are pretty ok with dying. Some are just apathetic but there's two that are too young or innocent to really understand death or what dying would mean and there's one alter that is set on living.

 

[turned_to_one]

i guess have a conversation with the one that wants to live. why do they oppose, and what do they think would make you change your mind about it?

it's a bit unfair to the ones who haven't agreed, since they may have their own intentions and feelings that are being ignored -choices taken away from them

 

[lyralynn]

I know it's unfair, really this whole disorder is unfair as none of us are ever really happy and in total agreement but I guess we're just doing our best to deal with it. I suppose I just need to keep working on getting everyone on the same page.

 

[wannabeangel]

same here, from the ones i can hear and talk to a bit they're usually not against the thought, besides someone protective and the clearest outside note i found from her said only "Don't let her die." referring to me. but no clarification was written with that just the sentence which kinda pissed me off, but she's always been protective since i was 12 and going yo psych wards for the first times. i dont know the best way to deal with these things, i hardly know how to deal with myself, but i wish things get easier on you and for every other part as well

 

[turned_to_one]

I know it's unfair, really this whole disorder is unfair as none of us are ever really happy and in total agreement but I guess we're just doing our best to deal with it. I suppose I just need to keep working on getting everyone on the same page.

there's an artist i really like that does a series of very insightful DID experience comics. maybe this can help?

 

[lyralynn]

there's an artist i really like that does a series of very insightful DID experience comics. maybe this can help?

Thanks ill definitely follow the tumblr

same here, from the ones i can hear and talk to a bit they're usually not against the thought, besides someone protective and the clearest outside note i found from her said only "Don't let her die." referring to me. but no clarification was written with that just the sentence which kinda pissed me off, but she's always been protective since i was 12 and going yo psych wards for the first times. i dont know the best way to deal with these things, i hardly know how to deal with myself, but i wish things get easier on you and for every other part as well

Thanks best of luck to you too