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Desire to CTB in public
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I drift in and out of wanting to CTB periodically. When I recall my experiences with society I have the desire for revenge. And what better revenge is there than CTBing in public? I know that could potentially be traumatic for otherwise good people but that is the point. Does anyone else feel like this?
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HeckingHecked, Shinobi, settheory and 1 other person
A man by where I live hung himself on the woods in the middle of the day. All it did was torture his family because everyone hated the man for doing what he did and his wife and kids were vilified because of him
If you want to take revenge, as many has said before me here in this thread, don't do it in a manner that will only negatively affect individuals around you. Most of them likely have nothing to do with your situation. To be honest, by being angry while you ctb and wanting to take revenge, any message you try to send or convey to anyone, including society, will be seen as completely irrational. I know what I just said fucking sucks, but try to rationally explain your anger in possibly a manner of a message. You don't have to actually think rationally while writing this, it must only appear to be.
This would create awareness for others wanting to ctb. Think about it this way: by doing a public ctb which you want to aim at society you are not damaging society at all. Society redirects that attack straight to us, like-minded people like yourself and I. So you would also be affecting us negatively, as people will deem you insane and ragefully pitiful. If not for society, do it for us. Leave a message, make a mark on this world, but think it out carefully so it could actually make a change and contribute to a potentially more pro-choice society.
This is my opinion on the matter!
Of course best of luck and I wish you unburdenment.
Reactions:
XIII, HeckingHecked, Whale_bones and 2 others
Only if you want to be remembered or if you want a suicide (yours) ingrained in people's memories forever.
When I was a kid I witnessed the aftermath of someone committing suicide (jumping from a great height), almost 30 years later I still remember it, the screams of bystanders, the crowd, the body, the blood!
I personally wasn't traumatized by it, but others might have been.
I don't get the desire to CTB in public. The desire for revenge is normal but why on earth would I take it out on innocent people who did nothing to hurt me? I get that society is shit as a whole, but logically speaking, a public suicide will do nothing to change that except give them more reason to think of suicidal people as maniacs.
~S
Reactions:
XIII, Whale_bones, Seaghost and 1 other person
what the fuck?! surely your death alone, by your own hands is enough to send a fuck you society message?
Doing in public, why traumatise some innocent, who may actually be enjoying life? because, believe it or not, there are those people out there, and we have no right to ruin it for them\!
I do not understand this. Personally I want to die far away from other people as I possibly can, in somewhere isolated. I only want to die to end my own pain, ideally I would not like to pass it on to others. I do not want to traumatise innocent people, who have not harmed me in any way.
My ideal situation would be to completely disappear. Also if you chose to ctb in public, isn't there a chance of others interfering with the attempt and it would not be successful. To me the whole purpose of doing any act with a motivation of revenge is to gain satisfaction from seeing other people in a disadvantaged position. If you ctb you will not be able to experience this satisfaction as you will no longer be alive.
I think public methods are acceptable until society offers better alternatives but revenged based thinking isn't very productive nor fruitful in anything long term.
I drift in and out of wanting to CTB periodically. When I recall my experiences with society I have the desire for revenge. And what better revenge is there than CTBing in public? I know that could potentially be traumatic for otherwise good people but that is the point. Does anyone else feel like this?
Was just about to post something like this. My next attempt will be successful, and although I can't do it in public, I'm planning on making a video-suicide note, with extreme in-depth detail. It won't be filtered, and it will have extremely high production value for the hell of it.
The idea of CBTing in public appeals to me not out of malice or revenge, but because I like the idea of being surrounded by people at the end of my life. I would feel "safer" and less afraid in that kind of setting, even though I understand attempting to CBT like this would greatly increase my risk of failure. I'd like to not feel lonely in my last few seconds on Earth. I'd like to see people going about their daily business without a care in the world essentially normalizing the CTB experience and distracting me from my own intentions and outcome through their own unawareness and innocence. As my vision fades, perhaps I'd see children laughing and parents and boyfriends and girlfriends chattering enjoying the sunshine, maybe a few concerned looks my way seeing me about to collapse. I wouldn't want to traumatize others or make anyone else suffer, but CBTing in public could easily result in that due to the nature of the act. Anyway, that's my take on the "appeal" of the "idea". I acknowledge that it would be very impractical and otherwise ethically/morally objectionable or controversial in practice though. I highly doubt though, I'd care about doing the "right" thing though after my death considering some neurons ain't going to be firing.
I drift in and out of wanting to CTB periodically. When I recall my experiences with society I have the desire for revenge. And what better revenge is there than CTBing in public? I know that could potentially be traumatic for otherwise good people but that is the point. Does anyone else feel like this?
yeah sometimes i feel like this , when i thought about times or people who treated me badly when i was in despair, and precisly, it because i feel the need to impact them with my destruction, or my death, and traumatize them, to make them feel their uglyness that they refuse to see.Sometimes its also a pityful way for me, to seek for some kind of ultimate connection with human, being, in the death,Connexion they refuse to me in an empzathic way, because most people are egocentric assholes
but not innocent, precise people, or people that i found, they re asshole, or piece of shit
( im in a very bad mood x) )
I drift in and out of wanting to CTB periodically. When I recall my experiences with society I have the desire for revenge. And what better revenge is there than CTBing in public? I know that could potentially be traumatic for otherwise good people but that is the point. Does anyone else feel like this?
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