Is there an "imposter syndrome" for depression and mental illness? How do you even figure out how much help you actually need and deserve? How do you know if you're fucked up enough?
I've always had issues with depression and suicide ideation. Past instances of self-harm and substance abuse. One attempt that I feel maybe wasn't that serious. But I feel like I have reached a new low or at least a new kind of low somewhat recently. I used to have some level of pride even in my worst moments, but my apartment is now a wreck. I don't maintain my hygiene on a daily basis. I can't find the strength to independently tackle very big and imminent problems that I haven't even mentioned here.
But then when I attempt to reach out to people, they often make me feel as if I should "just stop" and get over it and take care of everything. I don't know. I just feel so fucked up and I feel like I can't do any of this on my own, but simultaneously feel like I'm not supposed to receive help. Like this is all "fake" and there are "real" depressed people who the resources are reserved for.
I've always had issues with depression and suicide ideation. Past instances of self-harm and substance abuse. One attempt that I feel maybe wasn't that serious. But I feel like I have reached a new low or at least a new kind of low somewhat recently. I used to have some level of pride even in my worst moments, but my apartment is now a wreck. I don't maintain my hygiene on a daily basis. I can't find the strength to independently tackle very big and imminent problems that I haven't even mentioned here.
But then when I attempt to reach out to people, they often make me feel as if I should "just stop" and get over it and take care of everything. I don't know. I just feel so fucked up and I feel like I can't do any of this on my own, but simultaneously feel like I'm not supposed to receive help. Like this is all "fake" and there are "real" depressed people who the resources are reserved for.
