DEEP SADNESS

[Agreeable_Acadia125]

I'm 25M.

I used to love life. I get excited when I'm being challenged in school, work and life. I always have been chasing the excitement in life. I get high in working on a new project, meeting new people and thinking of new ideas and present it to people.

But right now I'm lost. I don't know myself anymore. I don't know what I like, what I want to do and how to spend my days. Things that used to make me happy, bores me easily. And it seems that I can't grasp what's real and important. For other people, it's their job, money, or their family. And I don't have those attachment anymore to the world. Everything is fleeting and I always questions myself what's the point in everything. I don't even know how to see myself, let alone value it. I also don't get excited in work and new opportunities, so I won't get my hopes up and be disappointed.

I love my parents. But I feel alone. I always have been alone. Even though I have friends and a girlfriend, I can't connect to them easily. I don't know how to express myself and the sadness I feel. I want to escape this sadness and have a good life. I want to die but I don't have the guts to kill myself. I've tried a lot of times. Whenever I try, the first thing that comes to my mind is God.

P.S. Wrote this last year and just a small setback, I'm back here.

 

[Euthanza]

If you have a lot of money, you can take a vacation for while, travelling alone is not so bad, I know some people who do that. It's the last thing in my wishlist before CTB, yet I know it wouldn't change my mind but more of a way to say farewell.

 

[theboy]

What changed so suddenly in your life that you feel this way? I'm sorry you feel this way.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm sorry you are in such a low patch. Have you ever talked to a doctor or therapist? I'm no expert in mental health but what you describe sounds very much like depression- no interest in things that used to make you happy etc.

I only briefly tried counselling and medication and for me, I can't say it really helped but I know of other people who have greatly benefited from it. Might be worth reaching out to see what support is available to you. I kind of hope that if you can remember a time when you were happy, there might be a chance that you can find your way back there with some help. I wish you well.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that you suffer like this. It really is such a depressing life. I hope that in whatever happens, you find relief from what you are going through as no one should have to endure such misery.