CTB with GHB

[rioghbhardain]

I've been feeling pretty shit and numb for the past year. I've known what it's like to be depressed since I was pretty young, but I always managed to cope and overcome the bad feelings. Now I'm desperate. I can't do anything but sleep (I literally can't), and I'm disappointed in every single thing. Life is pretty shit and so is humanity. We are all too cruel towards one another. This past year and a half has been hell. I moved into another city with my current boyfriend and was cut off from my friends and family as a result. I've been secluded home because of the virus and can't do any of the activities I used to do. Worst of all: my boyfriend has been abusing me in ways I never thought possible. Day in, day out. It just doesn't stop. Unfortunately I have nowhere to go, but I also don't have the strength to start anew. Simply can't. I'm completely destroyed. To make things even worse: I was diagnosed with HIV a couple of months ago. Never had I experienced anything like this. I know I'll never recover, the damage has been huge. Problem is, I wanna CTB, but I don't know where to do it. I can't do it home. I'm thinking of using GHB as a method but I'm not sure yet (SN seems difficult to find/get). I'm about to turn 33 and I've failed in every aspect of life. I am still young, but I definitely can't imagine what it must be like to feel like this at 40 or 50. I think 32 is a pretty decent age to CTB. I've had enough time to experience life and there's no freaking way I'll ever adjust. I don't think I could ever have another relationship. I've completely lost confidence in myself, and I don't trust people anymore. Any ideas of where I could do it? What do you all think about the method? Am I likely to succeed?

Cheers all,

 

[fox_wannabe]

There is not much here about this method. There are other fast methods that are also very effective, I think I will choose partial hanging for myself, which is fast and not that scary. Sorry you feel that way and about all that happened. There is so much that can go bad in life.

 

[deadverysoon]

is ghb like mdma?
and where can you get ghb?

think with another method this should work out better. but using it to be happier seems to work out well.
wikipedia says this

[...]Overdose of GHB can sometimes be difficult to treat because of its multiple effects on the body.[6][71][72] GHB tends to cause rapid unconsciousness at doses above 3500 mg, with single doses over 7000 mg often causing life-threatening respiratory depression, and higher doses still inducing bradycardia and cardiac arrest. Other side-effects include convulsions (especially when combined with stimulants), and nausea/vomiting (especially when combined with alcohol).[24][...]

its a salt
[...]
It is commonly used in the form of a salt, such as sodium γ-hydroxybutyrate (NaGHB, sodium oxybate, or Xyrem) or potassium γ-hydroxybutyrate (KGHB, potassium oxybate). GHB is also produced as a result of fermentation, and is found in small quantities in some beers and wines, beef and small citrus fruits.[8]
[...]

but you can get it as a medication
[...]
GHB is used for medical purposes in the treatment of narcolepsy[9] and, more rarely, alcoholism,[10][11] although there remains uncertainty about its efficacy relative to other pharmacotherapies for alcohol dependence.[12] It is sometimes used off-label for the treatment of fibromyalgia.[13][14] GHB is the active ingredient of the prescription medication sodium oxybate (Xyrem). Sodium oxybate is approved by U.S. Food and Drug Administration for the treatment of cataplexy associated with narcolepsy[15] and excessive daytime sleepiness (EDS) associated with narcolepsy.[16]
[...]


so i dont think its that illegal to get like other things. but maybe someone else knows more about this.

it seems not to be a very bad way to ctb.

 

[rioghbhardain]

I'm finding it hard to get GHB in the city where I currently live. Might have to travel. Anyway, I don't think you can get enough grams of GHB (I think 10 should do the trick) without a prescription unless you get it from a drug dealer. The thing I'm mostly desperate about is where to do it. I can't do it home. I don't want to rent an AirBnB and ruin somebody's day. Maybe a hotel? But I don't currently have a credit card? Does anyone have a better idea? I'm planning on CTB as soon as I get the GHB.