Crossroads

[Treeline589]

99.9% of me wants to CTB. I hate myself, I find no happiness in life, I'm just one big disappointment to myself. Today when anyone at work mentioned something about next week all I could think about is how I wouldn't be here. Yet the 0.1% of me wants to tell my therapist how desperate my suicidal thoughts/urges are. Luckily I have had a good experience with this therapist and am pretty honest about my suicidal thoughts. I just don't know what to do. I have this fear/dread of things never getting better and I don't want to live if I am going to be miserable.

Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[FuneralCry]

It sounds like you are going through a lot, it can be dreadful to live a miserable existence filled with suffering. My life is also very depressing, I have no idea what happiness would even feel like. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best.