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Tiredofhurting

Member
Feb 26, 2021
65
Is or has anyone been co dependent? How or what did you do to get over it or make it better?
 
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timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,371
There is a certain vagueness in the term. It is sometimes used of "enablers" in an alcoholism dynamic. It is sometimes used as a pejorative against those who someone feels should be more aggressive.

Perhaps a better approach is to consider dependency in a relationship and determine if the person being depended upon is worthy and the degree of dependency.

Some women would like to be able to depend on their husbands but can feel such an inclination is somehow a defect because others declare that they should be more independent. If we consider how different people are, allowance should be made for those who do not want to follow prevailing social trends.

Rather than being too concerned about co-dependency, I would suggest that you look at your relationships in terms of your preferences and see if changes, negotiations, or management strategies might improve things. You have to find what is right for you.
 
T

Tiredofhurting

Member
Feb 26, 2021
65
There is a certain vagueness in the term. It is sometimes used of "enablers" in an alcoholism dynamic. It is sometimes used as a pejorative against those who someone feels should be more aggressive.

Perhaps a better approach is to consider dependency in a relationship and determine if the person being depended upon is worthy and the degree of dependency.

Some women would like to be able to depend on their husbands but can feel such an inclination is somehow a defect because others declare that they should be more independent. If we consider how different people are, allowance should be made for those who do not want to follow prevailing social trends.

Rather than being too concerned about co-dependency, I would suggest that you look at your relationships in terms of your preferences and see if changes, negotiations, or management strategies might improve things. You have to find what is right for you.
There is a certain vagueness in the term. It is sometimes used of "enablers" in an alcoholism dynamic. It is sometimes used as a pejorative against those who someone feels should be more aggressive.

Perhaps a better approach is to consider dependency in a relationship and determine if the person being depended upon is worthy and the degree of dependency.

Some women would like to be able to depend on their husbands but can feel such an inclination is somehow a defect because others declare that they should be more independent. If we consider how different people are, allowance should be made for those who do not want to follow prevailing social trends.

Rather than being too concerned about co-dependency, I would suggest that you look at your relationships in terms of your preferences and see if changes, negotiations, or management strategies might improve things. You have to find what is right for you.
I appreciate the response. I am just trying to figure out why I am having such an issue letting go of someone who wants nothing to do with me. My kids are a big thing but idk just seeing if I could get a response like this one
 

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