chastised for sh scars

[apearl]

(psa: I know she didn't mean harm/was looking out for me. I appreciate her care but lemme rant)
I had to get my blood taken for some psychiatry stuff. I wore long sleeves but, u know, u have to roll them up to get your blood taken.

After the phlebotomist saw my scars she started a whole speech on how she hates to see people in pain and how I should never do that again, etc, etc. I told her they are old, but she kept pushing it.

Anyways, the whole thing made me feel awful. What am I suppose to do? The scars are years old. Is every medical professional who sees them also going to reprimand me for things in my distant past that I can't change? I personally am not ashamed of my scars, nor do I think they are ugly, but I'd really hate it if I have to go through this bs everytime :(

 

[CarbonBased]

I'm sorry to hear that. That must be really annoying. Do you only have scars on your wrists or also on your inner elbow? If it's just the wrists, you could probably get away with wearing some detachable/forearm sleeves when you're going to a doctor. I don't know for sure, but presumably they wouldn't insist you take them off unless they cover the area they want to examine/draw blood from. Also, imo they're quite stylish ^^

 

[apearl]

I'm sorry to hear that. That must be really annoying. Do you only have scars on your wrists or also on your inner elbow?

I got scars on my hand, wrist and elbow unfortunately, to be fair the elbow ones look more like an accident tho

If it's just the wrists, you could probably get away with wearing some detachable/forearm sleeves when you're going to a doctor.

Good idea, thank you for the help. My first thought when getting interrogated by the nurse was I should've wore a bunch of hair ties lol.

 

[westerly_merlin]

It is so shit when people (inc my therapist) say "you should stop doing that" as if it was something trivial that I was doing.

It shows a lack of empathy on the side of the healthcare professional.

 

[tonicer]

Get a tattoo near the scar saying "Hi, i am a SH scar from [insert year here]." or something like that. ;)

 

[apearl]

It is so shit when people (inc my therapist) say "you should stop doing that" as if it was something trivial that I was doing.

It shows a lack of empathy on the side of the healthcare professional.

Exactly!!! IMO, her monologue made it seem like I cut myself on a random Tuesday for no reason. An almost decade long struggle with SH that is reduced to "don't do this to yourself anymore"

I'm sorry it happened to you too :(

 

[softfur]

i wish you could know if people would be safe before you go in to see them they want you to be normal but they deny you the ability to be normal by treating you like that.

 

[LilGhost]

(psa: I know she didn't mean harm/was looking out for me. I appreciate her care but lemme rant)
I had to get my blood taken for some psychiatry stuff. I wore long sleeves but, u know, u have to roll them up to get your blood taken.

After the phlebotomist saw my scars she started a whole speech on how she hates to see people in pain and how I should never do that again, etc, etc. I told her they are old, but she kept pushing it.

Anyways, the whole thing made me feel awful. What am I suppose to do? The scars are years old. Is every medical professional who sees them also going to reprimand me for things in my distant past that I can't change? I personally am not ashamed of my scars, nor do I think they are ugly, but I'd really hate it if I have to go through this bs everytime :(

Thats completely unprofessional, just so you know . For me, only one doctor ever mentioned scars, but it cause they were fresh wounds I wasn't properly taking care of (and she didn't try to scold me or anything, she showed me ways to treat them and what products should I use, with 0 judgment). Sh can be ctb prevention and scolding a person for it would just make them feel shame, but won't do anything good. In your case it's even worser as it's old wounds . I may suggest to you , to firmly say if smth like that would happen again: "I find this discussion highly unprofessional, [please let me know if you have questions regarding the concern I came here for]". You don't own them explanation or compliance, just because they seem to worry. This way you don't have to be rude, but also that would be an escape from annoying conversation, as most doctors don't want to get in trouble by overstepping boundaries as it might end ugly for them
The only time I remember someone said bs like that were my friends, but that's a different story
The good news are not all medical professionals like that! Actually, that's kinda an indicator of how qualified they are. Cause if I'd hear such bs for example from my therapist, I would know they don't understand shit and clearly not a reliable source

 

[apearl]

Thats completely unprofessional, just so you know .

THANK YOU, I thought I was going crazy for thinking that was inappropriate behavior to a patient. ESP since she was a phlebotomist, not my primary doctor

For me, only one doctor ever mentioned scars

Woahh hope it stays that way

I may suggest to you , to firmly say if smth like that would happen again: "I find this discussion highly unprofessional, [please let me know if you have questions regarding the concern I came here for]".

Genuinely thank u for this cause I really didn't know what to say to her when she started talking about the scars. Having a dialogue ready definitely helps relieve future anxiety with doctors :)

The only time I remember someone said bs like that were my friends, but that's a different story

Ah sorry that happened to you man, I also had my fair share of friends having the worst response to seeing scars

The good news are not all medical professionals like that!

I really hope so