Because i never post....

[Irrelevant biologist]

I have been around for a while I'm sorry I just don't ever post because I don't feel like what i say will ever have relevance. I'm in a horrible cycle of OCD right now. Yes I have tried professional help (laugh). I do what I can to make it thru the day so when I get home I immediately get drunk because it is the only way to stop the thoughts. Does anyone else have this problem? Like I don't want to die but certainly wouldn't object to a random accident. Anything to make this stop.

Thank you for listening.

 

[ajdhabajdyst]

hey- im so sorry youre going through that,, i can definitely relate to the drinking n the dying bit. its like the only time im anything close to happy is when im drunk: tbh whenever i drink, a lot of me hopes i get alcohol poisoning and die, yet i dont ctb cause im afraid of the impact on others my death could have.

tcoy, i hope your OCD cycle ends soon

 

[Irrelevant biologist]

hey- im so sorry youre going through that,, i can definitely relate to the drinking n the dying bit. its like the only time im anything close to happy is when im drunk: tbh whenever i drink, a lot of me hopes i get alcohol poisoning and die, yet i dont ctb cause im afraid of the impact on others my death could have.

tcoy, i hope your OCD cycle ends soon

Thank you. Me too. I feel like there should be help for this but I cant seem to find it. Sigh.

 

[BlankUser]

I always get drunk because of my OCD. That's how I became an addict. It's such a cruel illness. However, I sometimes manage to keep it under control, I do exposure and response prevention and I'm taking Inositol. But it's very hard. When you expose yourself to your fears and refuse to do compulsions, you get less intrusive thoughts in the future. It takes time, but it works.

 

[ThrownAwayTom]

I hear you and I'm in the same spot. When I get paid I drink every day to block it out til I run out of cash and have to just deal with it (happened yesterday, 2 weeks til I get paid again)

Wish I'd get drunk enough to not wake up and then it'd be seen as an accident. Nothing worse than being sober with your thoughts.