Venting Awful day

[TheHatedOne]

I hate that I woke up. I woke up and saw the outrageous shit like 2 minutes after. From the state of sleeping and not being aware and not experiencing suffering I woke up back into this hellish world and not even 2 minutes after the suffering already started.

I cried then I just stared into distance feeling a lot and having a lot of thoughts in my mind.

Then I did some house related stuff. At one point my whole body started to shake. I blamed it on not eating, I was feeling hungry but really couldn't bring myself to eat. It took me hours to finally do that.

Now here I am again staring into distance and also just started shaking again. I'm all hopeless and defeated.

I seriously think that its not by spring 2022 that I have to go, but sooner.

 

[Flippy]

I really struggle to sleep, for a few reasons and there's not much I can do about it. But when I'm asleep, I rarely dream, or at least I don't recall any dreams. When I wake up, it feels so unpleasant. I don't know where I go when I sleep but it must be infinitely better than where I am when I wake up.

I can relate to the shaking. Usually when I wake up my body is shaking like I'm in some kind of shock. I attributed it to perhaps having low blood sugar/lack of food too. I'm enjoying eating less and less recently. I just feel sick, so it's a catch 22 situation. But not eating is slightly easier to deal with at times I guess.

I wish I knew what to do about it :-( I really hope you feel better soon.

 

[FuneralCry]

Being alive is very horrible, every day is miserable for me, I understand. I hate waking up as I instantly have feelings of dread. I'm sorry you have to go through this, no one should have to suffer like that. It is painful when things are hopeless. I hope you find peace.