I wouldn't advise doing that for attention if you do not want to die since, well, you could die, and I believe suicide should be done only after careful consideration, with no doubt left. When I see people saying they will kill themselves because of others, I can't help but feel conflicted. In truth, it would be a tragedy, in my eyes, for one to take their own life because of horrible, dismissive people out there that wouldn't even care, all to "prove" to them how real their suffering is. However, some people (non-suicidal people) will just never get it really, and, again, killing yourself primarily because of how it would affect others — like a form of revenge — can be, in my view, very problematic in terms of ethics and coercion; I can't endorse it, really.
Sometimes in my life I fantasized about others around me finally recognizing the wrongs they inflicted upon me. I say "fantasized" because that is, for me, exactly what it is: a fantasy. I know my family wouldn't bother, nor, for that matter, would my friends or acquaintances. They would all just say, "That weird kid killed himself? I wonder why he did not reach out for help! What a pity! Anyway..." and then move on with their lives and forget about it forever after.
Perhaps there is some form of catharsis or "Aha! I told you!" moment when you see those who abused you seeing you up on a ward. But I have come to realize — and I say this based on experiences I have personally witnessed — that, although they may cry and act differently towards you for a moment, it doesn't necessarily bring forth upon them some kind of deep awakening to the nature of their own actions or a clear-sighted view of their surroundings; it is not as if they suddenly regretted all their past actions, recognized their mistakes candidly, and changed their behavior for the better thereafter. In truth, what I saw is just more farcicality and shallow, hollow empathy, all unaccompanied by the kind of deep, sharp self-reflection that leads to meaningful personal growth and lasting reconciliation. That was the experience I witnessed, at least. I don't know your exact circumstances.
So, all of that said, I don't plan on committing (attempting) suicide for attention, as no one would meaningfully bother anyway; if I were to do it, it would be with full commitment.
I empathize with you. Feel free to talk to me if you wish. Sending virtual — yet warm — hugs.
but maybe cause I'm a man
