Ashamed of ones self

[Life_and_Death]

I cant be the only person that pushes others away for this reason.

Id like to hang out with my friend, play video games or whatever, but i dont want to see him. More specifically, i dont want him to see me. Before he didnt know about my disorders/problems but now be does and i feel so broken and useless. Like hes going to look at me and be able to see inside me to my heart. Like hes going to be able to see how bruised and scarred it is.

(Edit- i was walking at the time so now that im not, adding details)

 

[logan]

I can understand that very well.
One withdraws inwardly.
Partners and friends notice when something is wrong.

You don't want them to notice and behave differently - but that can't be avoided ...

 

[Bat 17]

I cant be the only person that pushes others away for this reason.

Id like to hang out with my friend, play video games or whatever, but i dont want to see him. More specifically, i dont want him to see me. Before he didnt know about my disorders/problems but now be does and i feel so broken and useless. Like hes going to look at me and be able to see inside me to my heart. Like hes going to be able to see how bruised and scarred it is.

(Edit- i was walking at the time so now that im not, adding details)

If he can look inside and see you to your heart, he's a lucky guy. He knows you and loves you and doesn't care about your "disorders"

 

[toforigivelife]

If he is aware of your disorders and is still your friend then he doesn't mind that you have disorders.

When the need arises have honest conversations about how your disorders affect you but reassure him that you are self-aware, can take responsibility for yourself and that he's not responsible for your disorders, the effects of these disorders or your behavior.

On the other hand, if he is unintentionally triggering your disorders then wait until the right time and have an honest, friendly, non-confrontational talk with him about it.

Like I said, he knows and he continues to be your friend.