Discussion anyone who have loved ones who ctb and left notes?

[meowzers3276]

tl;dr - if yes, did they leave a note? did it change your perspective on suicide notes and if so, how?

what do you personally think the best way to leave a word to your loved ones?

with that being said, i need advice on how to leave a note/final message or if i even should, coming from maybe someone whose S/O or family member ctb? do you wish that they left more or less after their death, when it comes explanation for their death? i dont know if i should keep it short or if my family and partner would appreciate having more to keep of my likeness. also, should i film a video where i speak, or is note/letter format ideal? i would think maybe they'd like to see me, but i am fortunate to not have had to witness someone else close to me ctb, so i dont know if that will be too much for them. (im not going to film my ctb, i will film a "note" video or voice message weeks beforehand and prepare it for them ahead of time.)

im mostly going to just say hey i hope you guys do good and plz cremate me, unless i decide to get all into the grime. but let me know, what do you think, from your perspective?

 

[GodChallengesMe]

I have long written a note and keeping it safe.

As for what to write, anything you'd like but most importantly, explain the reason why you are leaving and say that it's a personal decision and no one is involved. You just want to end it because of whatever reason you have and write the reason, that's it. No matter the reason, they will nevertheless be left saddened and guilty of not being able to provide help but it still matters to provide sound reasoning because after a while they will analyze your situation of why you did it when grieving becomes less intense, so if your motive involves fixable issues, they won't understand your decision and might even think you went crazy of doing this due to some fixable, transient issues be it relationships or financial difficulties.

I understand that some people might not have objective issues but still end their lives because of boredom or no longer wanting to live but unless one has no obligations to others it's their business when they end it, no matter the reasons. But, IMO, if you have loved ones who really care about you and you objectively analyze your problems and find them fixable, it would be irrational to kill yourself even if you're simply lazy fixing them and no longer want to bother here. They won't understand your decision in that case.

 

[meowzers3276]

I have long written a note and keeping it safe.

As for what to write, anything you'd like but most importantly, explain the reason why you are leaving and say that it's a personal decision and no one is involved. You just want to end it because of whatever reason you have and write the reason, that's it. No matter the reason, they will nevertheless be left saddened and guilty of not being able to provide help but it still matters to provide sound reasoning because after a while they will analyze your situation of why you did it when grieving becomes less intense, so if your motive involves fixable issues, they won't understand your decision and might even think you went crazy of doing this due to some fixable, transient issues be it relationships or financial difficulties.

I understand that some people might not have objective issues but still end their lives because of boredom or no longer wanting to live but unless one has no obligations to others it's their business when they end it, no matter the reasons. But, IMO, if you have loved ones who really care about you and you objectively analyze your problems and find them fixable, it would be irrational to kill yourself even if you're simply lazy fixing them and no longer want to bother here. They won't understand your decision in that case.

thanks!! i was planning on leaving some clarifying notes since my family are the type to point fingers, even in much smaller situations. this reinforces the fact that is definetly a good idea... haha

 

[wannabeangel]

i dont know the best way as i have been trying to think of the best way myself, but this one guide helped me quite a bit https://archive.ashspace.org/ashbusstop.org/Note.html this seems quite well thought out about dos and donts. notes are such a personal thing tho, the best way its written will be different for everyone

 

[meowzers3276]

i dont know the best way as i have been trying to think of the best way myself, but this one guide helped me quite a bit https://archive.ashspace.org/ashbusstop.org/Note.html this seems quite well thought out about dos and donts. notes are such a personal thing tho, the best way its written will be different for everyone

thank you!!

 

[no.death.bed.reQ]

If you have "time" - try writing a little at a time. Things/ideas will pop up and if you joy them down, eventually you'll have a note

 

[BlackDoor]

I was the last person to have a full conversation with a really good friend the night before they pulled the trigger the next morning. They left a really short generic note, they did address some points about what we talked about the night prior. Kind of a "if you know you know", so at least I know they thought about it, took my words to heart in some way. Honestly, the best thing, the words I cling to is the way I was addressed in his will. "To my dearest friend" so I knew he wasn't mad or upset, or felt like I didn't do enough for him when he was in pain. Just that, he had to go.

Long personalized meaningful letters can be good, but when it comes down to it just a moment of tenderness to say "even if I couldn't hold on, you made a difference, you mattered" can mean the world to someone. I feel the same. Even if they couldn't hold on, they really really mattered. So if it's love from the heart it will be precious regardless. As for explanations, I knew him really well, I needed no explanation. The apologies I personally didn't need. Maybe some others felt like they were owed one, not me.

 

[meowzers3276]

hi guys i thought i'd show you my current draft, i decided to keep it short (for a suicide note). i know these are personal or whatever but it isnt my final draft and i just want to share it here

Hello, if you are reading this document, I have committed suicide. I am currently beginning the drafting of this document on April 14, 2026. I may continue to add to or erase from this document leading up to the date of my suicide.

First, I would like to clarify that this was an entirely personal choice, made in a sound mind. While most may not consider those who commit suicide as mentally sound, I know that right now, my life is at its best. I have also continued taking my prescribed medications for related mental health conditions. My decision to commit suicide has been taken with months of consideration, no matter what point I was emotionally or physically. I understand that it is most ethical to end my life. I do not hold any person(s) accountable or responsible for any details that may have contributed to this decision, and I greatly urge all of my loved ones to use this event in order to unite and create peace.

Second, I would like to extend my deepest apologies to those I may inconvenience with the "sudden" nature of my death. To my employers, roommates, and others I have made long term agreements with, I am sorry. I truly hope and believe that those affected by my death, whether personally or not, are able to return to their state of normalcy.

Given my mental health and drug abuse history, it should not come as a surprise to medical or law enforcement officials as to why I committed suicide. I believe that after some time, my loved ones will also be able to rationalize my death. For the sake of closure, I will briefly state my reason for committing suicide. I have had constant, daily suicidal ideation from the moment I felt myself changing from child to woman. I don't know what shifted inside of me. I have failed to integrate into society, and I am constantly filled with complicated, painful feelings. In the past few years as I grow to an adult, I have felt myself losing the energy to continue in this life. I have slowly but surely lost my passion, identity, and anything that I personally feel makes life worth living. I think the world itself and the people in it are lovely, and if I were to continue to live I would have wanted to help the world be even lovelier. I love so many things! Unfortunately, that is not enough to keep me going. I have found a truly fatal method of suicide, and I am ready to say good-bye.

Thank you to all who contributed to my upbringing and experience in this world.

-(signed by me)

 

[SDB]

I would only leave note of who gets what. No one I know would care if I was alive or dead