Anyone here suffer from bpd/eupd?

[Pointless life]

Hi im just wondering if anyone here suffers from bpd/eupd.
Iv been diagnosed with this and severe depression for several years and its finally come to the point of ctb arfter everything in my life being destroyed partly due to these conditions. I have finally got everything i need to ctb just sitting in the kitchen staring me in the face these meds include
Diazapam
Amitryptalyn
Morphine
Cimetidine
My youngest sister used this method 4 years ago to successfully ctb so i know it will work
I have such a strong urge to take them all now but i have 1 final chance for my life to improve next month when i go to family court to try and get acess to my children. (I split from parter and shes stoped me seeing ny children for 7 months now which is one if the many reasons im wanting to ctb. If anyone here with eupd/bpd is there anything you do try try stop the impulsive actions. I just dont want to take it all now without proper planning and mess my plans up as ut took me along time to get everything together
Sorry for long post

 

[Not Sure]

BPD here, just one advice: wait until tomorrow. You probably have less than needed of those meds anyway.

 

[Chisel]

I'm being treated for Eupd atm. Under going therapy although finding its a total load of garbage I'm not going to use and find listening to the pathetic self help garbage isn't whats going to help me.
I recently went through a marriage breakdown. Although I have my daughter.
But still feel like ctb is my only option.
Don't like where future is headed and being alone struggling with a 7yr old, is not what I had envisioned.
I feel week, unsure of myself, naive and stupid.
Like I actually have never really understood what been going on around me.
Don't feel like I can hold it together, and I'm ultimately going to hurt and destroy my daughter like I have everything else in my life.
Ctb seems my only option as finding any shred of happiness seems a million miles away right now.