Anyone else want to die because of abuse?

[fatiguecentral]

As the title says. This is the main reason I want to die. I am also in an awful financial situation and don't see a future for myself worth living.

But maybe it would have been bearable if I wasn't abused for most of my life (at the hands of my family). It's not something I like to talk about in any detail but I believe has fractured my psyche. I have severe PTSD and Depression. I am alone now but permanently scarred.

Is anyone else in a similar boat?

 

[electrojellysoup]

I was emotionally neglected throughout my childhood and now I have so many difficulties stemming from that. Also the stress of knowing my parents might disown me if I came out to them

 

[Symbiote]

I like to rationalize the issue of my abuse was something that I was born into. I was born to be a vessel of abuse, to be abused in order to make others feel better, to be put down and insulted so that others can feel confident, etc. Some are born to be loved and cared for while others are born to be a tool for malicious purposes or used in financial transactions. Yesterday was an example and a culmination of all the abuse I've received over the years and it's starting to make sense. I was never meant to be loved, incapable of being loved, and no matter how hard I try to love them back, it backfires. Should I kill myself for something that I was destined to endure for the rest of my life? Or is this my punishment for something I did in a past life but can't recall? Just sucks that I won't be able to experience what's it like to receive some nice words and they actually mean it.

 

[ClownMe]

Not physical abuse, but mental. People dont realise how much being raised by narcissists affects you, hell, im 20 and they're still ruining my life with their nonsense.