Anyone else drunk or high in an almost futile attempt to forget how much they wanna ctb?

[BluesRunTheGame]

I mean for me I am somewhat intoxicated.

 

[lofticries]

Nope, too afraid that'll open a new set of problems for me. Everyone on my mom's side except her is either addicted to drugs or alcohol. Seeing what they do in the worst cases scares me off of them.

I guess my drug of choice if you can call it that is sleeping pills. But I haven't had to resort to them in awhile.

 

[virginiawoolf]

haha, i'm usually intoxicated at this point in the evening, but not today.
p.s. love your username. great song.

 

[TessB]

I'm not really the same.. I spend my life in a drunken haze just to blur life enough until I ctb. I'm drunk right now..

 

[inthemoonblue]

I'm drunk right now lol. And it only makes me want to ctb more. It helps me feel like I'm making the right decision at least.

 

[Deathbydemo]

I don't think there are any substances that will make me forget, to be honest. The thought is there permanently and overrides most other thoughts right now. I wish weed helped, but it doesn't really.

 

[gus.nixon]

I used to drink to blackout and I'd stay that way drinking around the clock for about a week at a time. I would literally forget everything. All the anxiety would vanish but I'd be a total wreck at the end of the binge. It was a blessing and a curse. I can't drink like that anymore.

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

After decades of chronic abdominal/GI pain (and worsening anxiety symptoms from that as well as depression), and a few other physical issues that cause chronic pain or symptoms, I have started relying on more Valium or Klonopin to get through this hell. It's not a LOT yet but more than my prescribed dose. Doesn't always help though. I wish I could drink but alcohol would only make my crappy stomach and gi problems worse.

 

[WornOutLife]

I love being drunk because I forget all about ctb. Life becomes just happiness. However, then, hangover comes and ruins everything, just like today lol.

 

[LONE WOLF.]

I mean for me I am somewhat intoxicated.

Yep I'm totally rat arsed, on two bottles of 17.5vol brandy liqueur and 50mls of valium yet l feel sober as a judge? Hangover cure, glass of flat lemonade and a big bowl of scrambled eggs with garlic powder mixed in while cooking! Works for me! But everyone's different l guess!

 

[DownfallEnlightened]

all. the. time.

 

[LiesAndLigatures]

Yes, tonight just like every other night. Anything to numb the pain of existence a little bit. My day will come soon enough.

 

[Canttakeitanymore]

Me to eigh now man

 

[Sans]

Here in the "land of the free" we have to be 21 years old to drink or use marijuana (and that's in the few states that actually allow marijuana). I can't drink just yet, but I've thought a lot about how I could drink my problems away and believe me, I'm counting down the months until I turn 21.

Thoughts of more "hard" drugs like cocaine or heroin have crossed my mind, but I wouldn't do that because it's not worth jail time. I just wish it was legal, but it would make me feel better, and we can't have that now can we?

 

[miseryh8scompany]

Here in the "land of the free" we have to be 21 years old to drink or use marijuana (and that's in the few states that actually allow marijuana). I can't drink just yet, but I've thought a lot about how I could drink my problems away and believe me, I'm counting down the months until I turn 21.

Thoughts of more "hard" drugs like cocaine or heroin have crossed my mind, but I wouldn't do that because it's not worth jail time. I just wish it was legal, but it would make me feel better, and we can't have that now can we?

Just as well, I've been dabbling with a bit of coke lately. It cures everything for like a half hour, then it just gets worse. I wish I could buy coca leaves which aren't as intense and can chew them all day.

 

[Sans]

Just as well, I've been dabbling with a bit of coke lately. It cures everything for like a half hour, then it just gets worse. I wish I could buy coca leaves which aren't as intense and can chew them all day.

Hey, if it cures everything for half an hour, then theoretically would you be cured for good if you had an unlimited supply of it?

 

[miseryh8scompany]

Hey, if it cures everything for half an hour, then theoretically would you be cured for good if you had an unlimited supply of it?

lol, unfortunately using a lot of it, it stops feeling good. You just crave it to stop the constant comedowns and turn into a jittery mess. Think about what crackheads look like, but not quite as bad.

I snort wellbutrin which is helpful, better than taking the pills. Dexedrine gives a bit of euphoria and motivation, and its long lasting. I'll probably start taking that again. And yes, I drink and use benzos pretty much every night. The occasional opiate too

 

[LONE WOLF.]

Yep I'm totally rat arsed, on two bottles of 17.5vol brandy liqueur and 50mls of valium yet l feel sober as a judge? Hangover cure, glass of flat lemonade and a big bowl of scrambled eggs with garlic powder mixed in while cooking! Works for me! But everyone's different l guess!

I meant to say l feel as sober as a judge just 3 hours later! I had to add this bit or l would have looked like a hypocrite! D'oh

 

[builtwrong]

I stay high cause it keeps me apathetic, removes the ability of life's misery to motivate me towards suicide. Just sedated enough to be alright with what I got, for a little while

 

[Fehler]

More than forgetting it, coping with it, the weed gives me short-term memory loss (less than I expected) and the idea of ctb I have already endured since a long time.
Still, with joint and cider in hand, I sometimes find myself laughing in Discord with my friends.
Then it is to take off the headphones, return to silence and recall the situation again.

 

[Fragile]

I haven't been truly sober for months because of it.

Not with alcohol, but with whatever drug I can find on the internet or in the pharmacies of my very permissive country.

 

[Unicorns]

Sleeping tablets becos sleeping is less painful than being awake. With any luck one day I won't wake up from them. I used to use alcohol but I'm usually sick after which isn't so fun. Plus I don't know anywhere to get reliable drugs from.

 

[Celerity]

Yes, and I've realized my only real remaining hobbies are getting wasted, this site, and Reddit. Living the fucking dream, man!

 

[bob mcbob]

I take Adderall infrequently. It's the only way to forget my physical and mental issues

 

[Celerity]

I take Adderall infrequently. It's the only way to forget my physical and mental issues

It made me extremely tense, but I don't have ADHD.

Not gonna stop me from trying to get the drug though. Big productivity booster.