Accepting death

[FireFox]

I have finally coming to terms with the fact I will die by suicide. It is no longer a matter of if but when.

The future scares me so much I don't want to see the next 10- 20 years . I am absolutely disappointed in what my life turned about to be. Nobody understands how scared I am of the future all everyone says I will be fine.

I dont belong here in this world and I have no future.

My family are all mad at me. I have upset everyone in my life.
Everyone is better off without me. I dont know where I belong in this world or who I really am.

I am not enough strong for this world.

I wanted to do massive things with my life ie travel , get married, make the world a better and have all these amazing experiences maybe it wasn't meant to be .

Nobody really does understand me I am misunderstood by many . I am all alone in this world.

All I know is when I kill myself everything that I feel and everything I am will be gone in a moment just like that. Death feels so liberating . It is nobody fault I killed myself I just wasn't made for life.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm really sorry to hear all that, dear.

I've accepted death too. I just don't know when I'll ctb but I'll probably do it sooner or later.

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[Life sucks]

I'm sorry that happened to you, life and humans made you suffer and feel worse, they are bad. Wish you peace and no suffering.

Love and hugs

 

[Pookie]

I hear you. Death would be a sweet release for me. My life scares me more than death itself. Hugs to you.

 

[FireFox]

I'm really sorry to hear all that, dear.

I've accepted death too. I just don't know when I'll ctb but I'll probably do it sooner or later.

Hugs and love,

Matt

I didn't kill myself living in this world killed me.

When I was a little girl I wanted a life of happiness and excitement and I thought I will have in this in the future. The little girln grows up to kill herself in the future . I used to see articles on the news about suicide and I never used to understand why people did it

Now I finally understand why. In the end the mental torment finally becomes too much and you just can't win anymore.

I feel like I am sinking and struggling to reach surface level. Everyday when I wake up I feel like this monster is taking over my body and its presence keeps lingering. Its doesn't leave me alone.

I dont recognise myself anymore. I feel dead inside

 

[lonerclown666]

Same bro but i deserved i will die this year i believed my future will be beautiful but got nothing but pain and hell

 

[eternalmelancholy]

My family are all mad at me. I have upset everyone in my life.

I think this is the most ironic and unjust thing about being suicidal. People actually get mad at you and blame you for not wanting a life you never even asked for.

People would rather see you suffer in great misery than have you give them minor inconvenience by committing suicide. Even though they will forget about you after a few weeks anyway.

 

[ForgiveMeMama]

Totally same. I've realized that the universe doesn't owe me anything and I don't owe it anything, so for right now I'm just doing what I want whenever I want. That mostly consists of getting high, playing video games, and occasionally crying. The day will come where I'll likely be pushed to my tipping point, but who cares until then?

 

[FuneralCry]

I relate so much. I get so much comfort from the thought of not being here. I have always struggled with life and It has always worked against me. It is simply inevitable that I have ended up this way. I think as humans we can only take so much until we lose the will to live. People who haven't been there will never understand. I wish you the best.

 

[Superdeterminist]

I relate so much to that! Life has just been a chain of disappointments and failures to meet expectations. Enough.