Mynameisnotimportant
4 years recovered. SS Vetran
- Aug 21, 2018
- 112
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/goodbye.11062/
I like to visit this site occasionally to post updates about my life because I would like to see more recovery stories on this site. So fucking much has changed in 2 years. My life hasn't gone at all where I expected but instead of chasing the almighty dollar, I decided to chase the happy.
Where I thought I would be:
-2nd year of college for bioengineering
-living in dorms sharing a room to save money
-possibly off antidepressants
-getting good grades
Where I am
-dropped out of college
-Working as aquatics specialist at PetCo
-going to start paramedic school soon
-Living with my boyfriend
-I own 10 fish tanks, 3 reptiles, many bugs, 3 guinea pigs, 3 hamsters (basically in heaven)
-still on the medication perscribed 2 years ago and its working fucking amazing
-social anxiety all gone (except phone anxiety)
-depression gone
The only way I got through the first 6 months of recovery was taking a trazadone when the late night depression thoughts would show up and cuddling with my guinea pig until it knocked me out. I haven't had a serious suicidal thought in over a year. I still have some mild trauma/PTSD from my attempt and can't watch any media talking about or depicting suicide. If my guinea pig dies or has serious health issues in the next year (unlikely, he's about 30 in human years), I will have to check myself in to a facility because that little dude is my hero. I started dressing more me and it feels so much better. I fucking love my job, I get to nerd about animals all day and pet about 5 different dogs every day. I also get to hang out with baby guinea pigs all day.
TLDR; in 2 years gone from 3 attempts in 4 months to happiest ever with MAJOR life restructuring.
I'm not active on this site but @comrade_wombat on twitter for all my cringe.
