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forbidden freedom

forbidden freedom

Member
Oct 12, 2020
7
Soon it will be my 10th anniversary of my first serious attempt. I've had two other bad attempts about 5 years ago.

I'm struggling with those failures.
 
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Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,015
I'm sorry friend. That must be quite surreal for you.
 
Metalhead

Metalhead

Born slippy
Sep 21, 2020
213
Do you struggle to come to terms with the fact that you failed, or is it that so much time has passed you by since it ?
Or maybe it's a combination?
I've had 2 failed attempts and sometimes it can feel so surreal when I look back on them.
 
happiestman

happiestman

Member
May 8, 2020
52
Do you struggle to come to terms with the fact that you failed, or is it that so much time has passed you by since it ?
Or maybe it's a combination?
I've had 2 failed attempts and sometimes it can feel so surreal when I look back on them.
Look like many has failed attempts. its bit discouraging for me. may I ask these attempts are done with proper planning or...
 
Metalhead

Metalhead

Born slippy
Sep 21, 2020
213
Look like many has failed attempts. its bit discouraging for me. may I ask these attempts are done with proper planning or...
Both attempts were done with proper planning and research, one thing that you can never underestimate is how strong the survival instinct can be. Feel free to either DM/PM if you want to know more information.
 
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forbidden freedom

forbidden freedom

Member
Oct 12, 2020
7
:O what u tried. why it failed?
Over does was #1. Some thing made me very angry and they think the adrenaline saved me. I was found the next day still unconscious on the floor. #2 was an insulin over dose. I grabbed the slow release pen instead of the instant. The insulin wasn't mine. I spent 3 days in iCU. #3 was tourniquet around neck. Was found "cyanotic" and "black" in color as the hospital staff found me.
Do you struggle to come to terms with the fact that you failed, or is it that so much time has passed you by since it ?
Or maybe it's a combination?
I've had 2 failed attempts and sometimes it can feel so surreal when I look back on them.
I hate that I fail. I'm scared to fail because I end up locked in a psych hospital. I'd rather be alive than trapped in that space helpless to end the suffering
Look like many has failed attempts. its bit discouraging for me. may I ask these attempts are done with proper planning or...
Solid planning, poor execution of the plans because of unclear thinking as I neared the end. I can't seem to overcome the distortions of reality and problems thinking as I try to execute a plan. Probably going to move towards an automated process and a hotel to insure proper amounts of time uninterrupted.
 
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