how mushrooms saved my life

[goldenbananagirl]

I just wanted to offer anyone reading this some hope that psychedelics can be an incredible tool for healing from mental illness and trauma. It's important to note that they are not for everyone, especially those with schizophrenia/BPD/or who are prone to psychosis. Even then, research is being done into how those individuals may be able to safely benefit from psychedelic medicines.

A few years ago I was suicidally depressed after a surgery went terribly wrong. I was in extreme turmoil and it was only thanks to guided psilocybin trips that I was able to heal and develop a strong sense of spirituality. I felt I became connected to nature and I found my purpose in life, which I felt and still feel is to help others in any way I can. I've heard of some people, on here and on Reddit, who got worse after using psychedelics. Most of the time this is because there wasn't appropriate follow-up (integration/therapy), or preparation, and occasionally someone uses a substance that simply isn't a good fit for them.

Ideally, the proper way to heal from severe mental illness/trauma would be in an indigenous way, like in the way ceremonies have been conducted for millennia all across the world. Peyote, san pedro, ayahuasca, and psilocybin ceremonies are a few examples.

Now, years later, I am only here because I am extremely ill with a variety of chronic illnesses that have robbed me of nearly any quality of life. If I wasn't sick, I'd still be out there traveling the world and enjoying life, just like psychedelics helped me to be able to do. I'm still 100% pro-choice, but if I had found this site before I had a chance to take mushrooms, then I wouldn't have had those years of adventure in life that ultimately made all of my suffering worth it, and I worry about other suicidal teens doing the same thing. To be honest, it makes me feel conflicted about this site at times- I'm not sure what to think.

Anyways, if anyone wants to talk or has questions about psychedelics, let me know :)

 

[thenamingofcats]

How does it work, do you find a therapist to guide you on mushrooms or do you see them afterwards to process?
Also I'm assuming this is just street drugs right? Idk what country you're in but is there a legal way to get them?

 

[goldenbananagirl]

How does it work, do you find a therapist to guide you on mushrooms or do you see them afterwards to process?
Also I'm assuming this is just street drugs right? Idk what country you're in but is there a legal way to get them?

I found a therapist online just by searching "psychedelic inegration therapists." But before that I just told my regular therapist about it and she helped me integrate my earlier experiences. It turned out that I had a lot of trauma from my childhood and from surgery complications

I'm in the US. I order them from a place where mushrooms are decriminalized so it's technically not legal but kinda in the grey area. Most people just grow them themselves if they don't buy them online I think, depending on their country. anyone interested can message me for the site I order the mushrooms from

 

[DepressedDude]

Would they do anything for you now or is it not for severe depression?

 

[goldenbananagirl]

Would they do anything for you now or is it not for severe depression?

I still take them as medicine. They've helped me embrace that I may die from my illness. I've made peace with my death although I still do not want to die necessarily.

But I think for a typical suicidal person, like how I was years ago, it can give you an incredible shift in perspective

 

[Esokabat]

I completely agree with this post. I am able to buy them legally where I live.
They are spiritually and emotionally transformative. I would personally recommend to everyone on this site who is not bipolar, schizophrenic, etc.
To me, psilocybin and other healing psychedelic medicines worth more than decades of psychotherapy. It might even change your views on CTB or if CTB is necessary due to illness or chronic pain, it might completely change your view about death. I sincerely hope that they will get legalized in every country in the world, the world would be a better place

 

[goldenbananagirl]

I completely agree with this post. I am able to buy them legally where I live.
They are spiritually and emotionally transformative. I would personally recommend to everyone on this site who is not bipolar, schizophrenic, etc.
To me, psilocybin and other healing psychedelic medicines worth more than decades of psychotherapy. It might even change your views on CTB or if CTB is necessary due to illness or chronic pain, it might completely change your view about death. I sincerely hope that they will get legalized in every country in the world, the world would be a better place

Exactly! I agree with this 100%

Would they do anything for you now or is it not for severe depression?

Also not sure if I understood you right, but mushrooms are incredible for severe depression if that's what you were asking

 

[platypusfan]

I am glad they have helped you like that, recently I have been looking into this and I will probably try it soon. What does the dosage look like for you? Was it a microdose or a full trip or something in between?

 

[ham and potatoes]

I still take them as medicine

What are the "medical" doses that you would recommend?
Just a little micro doses, or full on trip? Or somewhere in between?

 

[goldenbananagirl]

I am glad they have helped you like that, recently I have been looking into this and I will probably try it soon. What does the dosage look like for you? Was it a microdose or a full trip or something in between?

I suggest trying a microdose first, then if that goes well, maybe a higher dose like 1-2 grams. It's important to research and make sure you're not taking any medications that could negatively interact with psilocybin. I also highly recommend having a trusted tripsitter and doing this in a safe place.

What are the "medical" doses that you would recommend?
Just a little micro doses, or full on trip? Or somewhere in between?

Right now I can only tolerate micro doses due to how my illnesses have progressed. I wish I could have a full on journey on 1-2grams of mushrooms

 

[martinso67]

I still take them as medicine. They've helped me embrace that I may die from my illness. I've made peace with my death although I still do not want to die necessarily.

But I think for a typical suicidal person, like how I was years ago, it can give you an incredible shift in perspective

It's great that it did help you. Does this medicine surpress your physical pain and stop negative intrusive feelings?

 

[goldenbananagirl]

It's great that it did help you. Does this medicine surpress your physical pain and stop negative intrusive feelings?

It helped with some physical pain I had at the time and it also helped me to overcome intrusive thoughts/traumas by confronting them

 

[DepressedDude]

Does it mess your vision up? Like can you still walk around and act normal if there's other people around?

 

[goldenbananagirl]

Does it mess your vision up? Like can you still walk around and act normal if there's other people around?

I wouldn't take mushrooms around people who don't know I am. It's part of my protocol for respecting the medicine honestly. Set and setting are key :)

 

[Esokabat]

Does it mess your vision up? Like can you still walk around and act normal if there's other people around?

Why would you be walking around? This is serious medicine. Respect it and do the work, this is not to party around. I personally sometimes start to sob when all of a sudden I receive a revelation about my life or life in general. Sobbing not from sadness but the joy of revelation. Or sometimes I dance (on my own) in a trance for hours, and during the dance, I receive incredible revelations. If you want to use this medicine for therapy, be in a safe and comfortable place where you can cry, laugh, get deep into meditation or contemplation. Nobody is talking about walking on the street with people you don't know, trying to hide the fact that you are in an altered state of awareness. Respect the medicine and do it alone or with a theaurapist or guide if you want healing. If you want to party, party away but don't expect healing that way. It would be a torture for me walking in the street and trying to pretend I am not affected. It will waste the mushroom trip, you can get so much more out of it if you respect "Set and Setting"

 

[goldenbananagirl]

Why would you be walking around? This is serious medicine. Respect it and do the work, this is not to party around. I personally sometimes start to sob when all of a sudden I receive a revelation about my life or life in general. Sobbing not from sadness but the joy of revelation. Or sometimes I dance (on my own) in a trance for hours, and during the dance, I receive incredible revelations. If you want to use this medicine for therapy, be in a safe and comfortable place where you can cry, laugh, get deep into meditation or contemplation. Nobody is talking about walking on the street with people you don't know, trying to hide the fact that you are in an altered state of awareness. Respect the medicine and do it alone or with a theaurapist or guide if you want healing. If you want to party, party away but don't expect healing that way. It would be a torture for me walking in the street and trying to pretend I am not affected. It will waste the mushroom trip, you can get so much more out of it if you respect "Set and Setting"

This is excellent advice. Thank you for sharing. I would share more if I was physically able to type more

 

[lita-lassi]

please forgive the scattered nature of this post:

everyone has some unique reactions with psychedelics, mainly the thought process that unfolds whilst intoxicated. a lot of people have unfortunate first experiences in a party setting where someone just tosses them some substance and assures them its fun, then the sensory issues and nausea pile up. or, great experience! and they party but theres no real deeper therapy in the experience. fun is great and necessary, yes, but we're discussing psilocybin medicinally. the intensity of sensation, visuals, emotions etc all are effected by how much you take and, to an extent, to type/strain of mushrooms you eat. the set and setting are seriously the most important aspect as previously stated, however, and do need to be respected as its actually therapy/medicinal for progress to be gained. but, there is an extremely high risk for those with depression issues to be stuck in negative thought loops and feel very overwhelmed. things feel very different as your nervous systemis suddenly very wired, everything becomes quite intense, and it effects mood and stability more than expected. it can become very hard to break away from thoughts youd normally be able to stop when sober. someone with a lot of experience on the therapeutic side to guide and assist (not some dealer or partier) id say is almost mandatory for higher doses. id say its similar to how, when seeking help or advice, unloading on a friend whos ill-equipped to be a therapeutic support system may simply respond to your venting with "that sucks", whereas a therapist or counselor may intuit "sounds like theres something specific in your trauma/childhood/x experience at the base of this particular issue youre dealing with, what can you unpack from that and where can we go from here". granted, its not a magic bullet and i dont think anyone should go into psychedelics with the attitude of "this will cure me". if the ability to "let go" and "let it happen" are achieved, it almost definitely comes with a much stronger sense of acceptance and a change in perspective.

microdoses are small enough (like 1/10 of a gram) that you wont consciously feel any side effects and the dosing regimen should be strict like actual medication. either every other day or at least 2 days off, ive heard both. talk to professionals and consult multiple accredited sources online about the processes that youre interested in.

i hope i didnt sound like i was arguing with any points made previously, i definitely agree i just know i can come off as harsh or confrontational when in a little bit of a rush to post

 

[divinemistress36]

I've just microdosed and it just gives me anxiety and confirms that I want to die even more. Anyone feel this way?

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I've just microdosed and it just gives me anxiety and confirms that I want to die even more. Anyone feel this way?

I remember it causing my awful thoughts to be amplified the first time I tried them. You have to be in a good headspace while using them in order for them to work. It took until my third trip for me to get to a point where I learnt to keep my negative thoughts and feelings at bay and not try to fight against the shrooms. Since then, all my trips have been great.

 

[J&L383]

Guided therapy centers are now open in Oregon, but it costs $$$, with of course no guarantees of how it might help. I'm considering it, but there is a lot of variability on experiences which makes me nervous. I do have people I know that take it and have positive results.

 

[BrainShower]

Does it mess your vision up? Like can you still walk around and act normal if there's other people around?

You cannot act normal at all. That just doesn't work whatsoever.

 

[goldenbananagirl]

You cannot act normal at all. That just doesn't work whatsoever.

This is very true. Set and setting is everything

 

[Dark Window]

Any risks?

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Any risks?

If you have a genetic predisposition to schizophrenia or just psychosis in general then they could cause it to onset. There is also the risk of having a bad trip, though some state that their bad trips did change them for the better, others report being traumatized by them. In a lot of cases, this happens due to the person not taking the steps needed to minimize the risk of having a bad trip but even if you prepare for it prior there is always a risk of your trip going south. They can also cause HPPD over time, though in most cases the symptoms will die down after a while. There have been a few claims from people stating that it never went away and claiming that it is so severe that it impacts their daily life, but they seem to be in the minority.

Otherwise, mushies are considered to be very low risk, especially in comparison to most drugs out there. Despite this, they still require some mental and physical prep work before use and you need to make sure to measure out your dosages properly using a scale.

Some sources to look into for more info:

Psilocybin (Magic Mushrooms) | National Institute on Drug Abuse

Learn more about NIDA research on the therapeutic potential of psychedelic and dissociative drugs.

nida.nih.gov

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9353971/

Psilocybin (Magic Mushrooms) Uses, Effects & Hazards - Drugs.com

History, effects, medical uses and legal status for psilocybin, also known as magic mushrooms.

www.drugs.com

 

[Dot]

I just wanted to offer anyone reading this some hope that psychedelics can be an incredible tool for healing from mental illness and trauma. It's important to note that they are not for everyone, especially those with schizophrenia/BPD/or who are prone to psychosis. Even then, research is being done into how those individuals may be able to safely benefit from psychedelic medicines.

A few years ago I was suicidally depressed after a surgery went terribly wrong. I was in extreme turmoil and it was only thanks to guided psilocybin trips that I was able to heal and develop a strong sense of spirituality. I felt I became connected to nature and I found my purpose in life, which I felt and still feel is to help others in any way I can. I've heard of some people, on here and on Reddit, who got worse after using psychedelics. Most of the time this is because there wasn't appropriate follow-up (integration/therapy), or preparation, and occasionally someone uses a substance that simply isn't a good fit for them.

Ideally, the proper way to heal from severe mental illness/trauma would be in an indigenous way, like in the way ceremonies have been conducted for millennia all across the world. Peyote, san pedro, ayahuasca, and psilocybin ceremonies are a few examples.

Now, years later, I am only here because I am extremely ill with a variety of chronic illnesses that have robbed me of nearly any quality of life. If I wasn't sick, I'd still be out there traveling the world and enjoying life, just like psychedelics helped me to be able to do. I'm still 100% pro-choice, but if I had found this site before I had a chance to take mushrooms, then I wouldn't have had those years of adventure in life that ultimately made all of my suffering worth it, and I worry about other suicidal teens doing the same thing. To be honest, it makes me feel conflicted about this site at times- I'm not sure what to think.

Anyways, if anyone wants to talk or has questions about psychedelics, let me know :)

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Therapy Methods & Alternatives Explained

"If you want to help someone you need to know something about them" - 'It's A Wonderful Life' Considering therapy but don't know where to start? Hopefully this can be a starting point about what all those different terms mean, and help to pick the right therapist. There are also options further...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[todienomore]

Id recommend morning glory or woodrose seeds as an alternative. Its a much more euphoric trip, less likely to be unsettling.

You basically have to sprout the seeds or do an extraction with a little bit of acidity. Its more complicated than that but thats the gist.

There can be some body load/nausea (hopefully avoided by extraction) but its more tolerable than mushrooms, which is also mild but annoying sometimes.

Another advantage is they are legal to buy. Just get untreated, even organic seeds