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waterrrrrrrrrbottel

Experienced
Jul 18, 2022
246
I'm mostly just explaining my reason, even though nobody asked. I just want someone to understand.

I've been the weird kid all my life. I grew up extremely antisocial and just really "dumb". I think the word "dumb" is used too often but I was. I wasn't dumb academically, but I could very rarely understand and thrive in social situations. I'm a clumsy person and I just don't think when I'm by myself. It has been such a long time since I realized this about myself, and I've tried to improve myself, but to no avail. It's extremely difficult for me to make worthwhile friends. I'd take anybody as a friend, but I'm far too private and scared to let them be close to me. While approaching my mid 20s, I'm understanding that suicide was meant to be. I cannot find happiness anywhere except the comfort of my own room. I'm worthless to everybody in my day-to-day, personal life.

I'm so sorry if I sound stupid or inexperienced here. But it's a forum with hopefully empathetic individuals. I'm not the type of person to fit in anywhere, and I fear the same is true for here.
I've also asked VERY dumb questions in this forum while in hysterics, I was not thinking straight.
 
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Reactions: pole, GentleJerk, wielkiwrobel and 5 others
S

setoursailsagain

Member
Jun 8, 2022
20
I can relate to a lot of what you're saying. Ive never really fit in and still struggle socially even though im now 35. Also you don't sound stupid at all, It's incredibly hard to talk about your feelings, especially publicly.

You definitely fit in here, I feel we are all odd shaped puzzle pieces that fit together somehow on this site and I personally feel a bit better just joining even though Ive not really posted much.

Anyway, not much else I can offer other than my usual.....hugs.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,449
I also feel like I never belong anywhere, in my case I should have never existed in the first place, there is absolutely nothing here for me in this world. This life really is so cruel and I know that it's hard to carry on when you are struggling. I wish you relief.
 

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