Venting Worsening Situation yet Less Ideation

[EternalShore]

I'm rarely ever sewer slidal nor depressed nowadays despite my situation gradually deteriorating more and more~ Like I'll get assigned stuff to do in "my free time"~ But like, my free time is such a joke at this point. My "free time" is just when I'm procrastinating homework (which I've never done before but when it never ends, why shouldn't I?) or staying up into hours where I should be sleeping for the sake of doing anything non-school-related~ I'm struggling at keeping up with everything and am absolutely failing at my responsibilities despite sinking all my time into them~ >_<

They say grading papers is the one of the worst parts, but I like it actually myself~ It's pretty calming, and you can be sweet, kyute, and helpful to the kids without having to deal with them misbehaving~ :) It's far better than practically every other aspect of the job...

In regards to the sewer slidal aspect, maybe it's that I've accepted that things just aren't ever going to get better for me, and I just need to do my best through it all~ After all, I still don't have my SN back (:///), and there's not an opportune time to get warded rn~ >_<

hehe~ I never particularly liked memes, but these images are all too true~ >_< The one certainty I've had over the last few months is that no matter what happens, it's going to get even worse~ and welp, I've not been proven wrong in that unfortunately~ >_< and even once this is over, well... :( It'll be less exhausting at the very least, but then, I'll have different yet related concerns~ >_<

I wish I knew all this back when I thought 6th grade and especially 9th grade were awful~ I would've enjoyed them far more instead of getting upset~ Because sure, 4th-5th grade were incredible, but they were still miles ahead of where things are now~ 10th grade and onwards were hellish, altho I don't remember much because of memory suppression~ Sure, now, is still probably worse, but it's hard to know if I could've done anything better... because I did try... I really did... And I do now... :(

Just thinking about how bad things really are tho is just depressing tho, so I should probably stop~ >_< Regardless, if you think I'm doing better because I'm not using SS more often, nope! Not one bit! >_<

Long live the early 2000s! ^_^ The golden ages of everything! :D

 

[GlassMoon]

Sorry to hear school's still taking up most of your free time! I hope it will get better once more routine comes into it, as much as that's still possible.

My free time will likely go down soon, too. And I'll have to get up really early. I feel along with you

 

[EternalShore]

Sorry to hear school's still taking up most of your free time! I hope it will get better once more routine comes into it, as much as that's still possible.

My free time will likely go down soon, too. And I'll have to get up really early. I feel along with you

I'm sorry that you have to deal with all that stuff too~ >_< I hope we can both make it through it! ^_^