binkleshpoo
Member
- Jan 23, 2026
- 15
Hello. Does anyone have information on whether or not a KN death looks like a suicide? I will unfortunately have to do this in the apartment that my father owns and that my mother and I live in, as I am not independent. I would stay a day at a motel so they wouldn't find me, but that would make it immediately apparent that it was a suicide. Even if the KN remains in my room, hidden away, it might appear like I just died in my sleep until it would be found hopefully months later if at all.
I am concerned about this because I am extremely afraid the grief of my death will cause my dad, who finally has a nice job after failing to get one for about a year, to become unable to work, lose his job, and get him and my mother on the street. My parents are Caribbean, both of them have had family members who have passed before, (but never their own child, my Dad has even watched someone close to him die in an accident) and they have a strange view on mental health and things like grieving and being emotionally weak, so part of me is hoping that I am just paranoid and they will be able to continue forward. Not without sadness, of course, I know its going to be hard for them. But I hope they'll be able to push forward enough that the pain doesn't make them sink underwater.
I would feel much less guilty about what I am going to do to my parents if it doesn't look self inflicted. About fasting, sometimes I don't eat almost all day, so I'm sure it wont raise any alarm. (this is infrequent but it happens, sometimes my brother also just does not eat. It's not for any reason in particular, sometimes I'm just focused on something and that leads to me not eating for hours. I suppose on the day of CTB, I could eat breakfast in the morning but nothing more, to dissolve any possible suspicion.)
I am concerned about this because I am extremely afraid the grief of my death will cause my dad, who finally has a nice job after failing to get one for about a year, to become unable to work, lose his job, and get him and my mother on the street. My parents are Caribbean, both of them have had family members who have passed before, (but never their own child, my Dad has even watched someone close to him die in an accident) and they have a strange view on mental health and things like grieving and being emotionally weak, so part of me is hoping that I am just paranoid and they will be able to continue forward. Not without sadness, of course, I know its going to be hard for them. But I hope they'll be able to push forward enough that the pain doesn't make them sink underwater.
I would feel much less guilty about what I am going to do to my parents if it doesn't look self inflicted. About fasting, sometimes I don't eat almost all day, so I'm sure it wont raise any alarm. (this is infrequent but it happens, sometimes my brother also just does not eat. It's not for any reason in particular, sometimes I'm just focused on something and that leads to me not eating for hours. I suppose on the day of CTB, I could eat breakfast in the morning but nothing more, to dissolve any possible suspicion.)
