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idelttoilfsadness21

I need a moment right now
Jan 6, 2025
650
Post a reason you feel like [blank] thing doesn't exist to you In your own words and what made you feel that way or why you believe it and how it helped you resolve something in your life

for me, its family.... I felt family is something that is just you existing with people for the sake of it and it doesn't mean anything and you are your own identity without the people you were born into, and I've believed this since I recognized that people will always be subjected to abuse and your family can't protect you, you are alone, and so are they, as they were once children, too, yet people place a need on this, and it has helped me distinguish a character of my loneliness and my feelings and why I am very codependent in my life, because family doesn't exist to me.
 
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timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,362
A guy I once worked with and I were talking about a fellow employee that I found very difficult to deal with. He commented, "There are some people who do not exist in my universe". Avoidance can be a good coping strategy. However, if one cuts too much out of life, it can make what remains somewhat less satisfying. Avoidance can be a necessary way to heal. However, after healing a tactical exploration of re-engagement may cautiously find paths of building connections with those who are not only not toxic, but could even be helpful.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
11,499
There are certainly things I think most likely won't exist for me now. Although, I don't necessarily deny their existence in general. I don't think I'll experience romantic love now. Too many bouts of limerence have made me wary of letting crushes develop. Plus, I don't like elements of most couple's relationships I know of and, I've learned to really appreciate my own independence. It's not that it was always impossible for me but, it seems most unlikely now. Also, because I'm not putting in the effort to attract anyone!

The same kind of principle goes for deep friendships. I'm wary of them now, given how upsetting it's been to lose them in the past.

Also, major success in my career seems unlikely now. I'm not willing to put myself through the uncomfortable (mainly social) challenges to push myself further. I'm not even convinced it would make me happy. Odd because it's all I ever wanted for a long time.

There are plenty of other things I'm suspicious of. I'm not convinced that certain types of people change. I certainly wouldn't put my trust in some who have caused problems in the past.

I think (lack of) talent is a limiter. I don't believe that simply hard work will enable us to succeed in anything. I think certain things almost require a certain type of brain to be able to do them- well at least. So, I kind of accepted that certain things in life- I may improve at marginally if I do them more but, I'll likely never be at the level of someone who excels in whatever it is.

That said, I'm not a massive believer in luck either! Most of the time, I think people make their own luck. It's their initial effort that leads to opportunities. That's my experience anyway. Very rarely has good fortune come out of the blue. I've usually been out fishing for it to catch anything.

Freedom won't really exist for many of us. Maybe not until we die. Kind of depressing really.

I'm not convinced that a God or afterlife exists. Although, I'm not convinced that they don't either! I wish I was surer in believing they didn't to be honest.

I think true altruism is rare. Perhaps it does exist but, most of the time, I think there's a motive. Even if it's a nicer one- that we help others because it makes us feel good and appreciated.

There's certainly a whole lot I wish didn't exist in this world!
There are certainly things I think most likely won't exist for me now. Although, I don't necessarily deny their existence in general. I don't think I'll experience romantic love now. Too many bouts of limerence have made me wary of letting crushes develop. Plus, I don't like elements of most couple's relationships I know of and, I've learned to really appreciate my own independence. It's not that it was always impossible for me but, it seems most unlikely now. Also, because I'm not putting in the effort to attract anyone!

The same kind of principle goes for deep friendships. I'm wary of them now, given how upsetting it's been to lose them in the past.

Also, major success in my career seems unlikely now. I'm not willing to put myself through the uncomfortable (mainly social) challenges to push myself further. I'm not even convinced it would make me happy. Odd because it's all I ever wanted for a long time.

There are plenty of other things I'm suspicious of. I'm not convinced that certain types of people change. I certainly wouldn't put my trust in some who have caused problems in the past.

I think (lack of) talent is a limiter. I don't believe that simply hard work will enable us to succeed in anything. I think certain things almost require a certain type of brain to be able to do them- well at least. So, I kind of accepted that certain things in life- I may improve at marginally if I do them more but, I'll likely never be at the level of someone who excels in whatever it is.

That said, I'm not a massive believer in luck either! Most of the time, I think people make their own luck. It's their initial effort that leads to opportunities. That's my experience anyway. Very rarely has good fortune come out of the blue. I've usually been out fishing for it to catch anything.

Freedom won't really exist for many of us. Maybe not until we die. Kind of depressing really.

I'm not convinced that a God or afterlife exists. Although, I'm not convinced that they don't either! I wish I was surer in believing they didn't to be honest.

I think true altruism is rare. Perhaps it does exist but, most of the time, I think there's a motive. Even if it's a nicer one- that we help others because it makes us feel good and appreciated.

There's certainly a whole lot I wish didn't exist in this world!
There are certainly things I think most likely won't exist for me now. Although, I don't necessarily deny their existence in general. I don't think I'll experience romantic love now. Too many bouts of limerence have made me wary of letting crushes develop. Plus, I don't like elements of most couple's relationships I know of and, I've learned to really appreciate my own independence. It's not that it was always impossible for me but, it seems most unlikely now. Also, because I'm not putting in the effort to attract anyone!

The same kind of principle goes for deep friendships. I'm wary of them now, given how upsetting it's been to lose them in the past.

Also, major success in my career seems unlikely now. I'm not willing to put myself through the uncomfortable (mainly social) challenges to push myself further. I'm not even convinced it would make me happy. Odd because it's all I ever wanted for a long time.

There are plenty of other things I'm suspicious of. I'm not convinced that certain types of people change. I certainly wouldn't put my trust in some who have caused problems in the past.

I think (lack of) talent is a limiter. I don't believe that simply hard work will enable us to succeed in anything. I think certain things almost require a certain type of brain to be able to do them- well at least. So, I kind of accepted that certain things in life- I may improve at marginally if I do them more but, I'll likely never be at the level of someone who excels in whatever it is.

That said, I'm not a massive believer in luck either! Most of the time, I think people make their own luck. It's their initial effort that leads to opportunities. That's my experience anyway. Very rarely has good fortune come out of the blue. I've usually been out fishing for it to catch anything.

Freedom won't really exist for many of us. Maybe not until we die. Kind of depressing really.

I'm not convinced that a God or afterlife exists. Although, I'm not convinced that they don't either! I wish I was surer in believing they didn't to be honest.

I think true altruism is rare. Perhaps it does exist but, most of the time, I think there's a motive. Even if it's a nicer one- that we help others because it makes us feel good and appreciated.

There's certainly a whole lot I wish didn't exist in this world!
There are certainly things I think most likely won't exist for me now. Although, I don't necessarily deny their existence in general. I don't think I'll experience romantic love now. Too many bouts of limerence have made me wary of letting crushes develop. Plus, I don't like elements of most couple's relationships I know of and, I've learned to really appreciate my own independence. It's not that it was always impossible for me but, it seems most unlikely now. Also, because I'm not putting in the effort to attract anyone!

The same kind of principle goes for deep friendships. I'm wary of them now, given how upsetting it's been to lose them in the past.

Also, major success in my career seems unlikely now. I'm not willing to put myself through the uncomfortable (mainly social) challenges to push myself further. I'm not even convinced it would make me happy. Odd because it's all I ever wanted for a long time.

There are plenty of other things I'm suspicious of. I'm not convinced that certain types of people change. I certainly wouldn't put my trust in some who have caused problems in the past.

I think (lack of) talent is a limiter. I don't believe that simply hard work will enable us to succeed in anything. I think certain things almost require a certain type of brain to be able to do them- well at least. So, I kind of accepted that certain things in life- I may improve at marginally if I do them more but, I'll likely never be at the level of someone who excels in whatever it is.

That said, I'm not a massive believer in luck either! Most of the time, I think people make their own luck. It's their initial effort that leads to opportunities. That's my experience anyway. Very rarely has good fortune come out of the blue. I've usually been out fishing for it to catch anything.

Freedom won't really exist for many of us. Maybe not until we die. Kind of depressing really.

I'm not convinced that a God or afterlife exists. Although, I'm not convinced that they don't either! I wish I was surer in believing they didn't to be honest.

I think true altruism is rare. Perhaps it does exist but, most of the time, I think there's a motive. Even if it's a nicer one- that we help others because it makes us feel good and appreciated.

There's certainly a whole lot I wish didn't exist in this world!
 
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