My life is really, really shit super shit.
Then again, I bet most people's are, not many people will be on here who doesn't feel that their life is lacking in someway and I understand that most people will be worse off than me.
To cut a long story short I had a pretty shitty childhood in and out of care and a lot of abuse in my childhood, left school with no qualifications, haven't held down a job for longer than a few months in over 15 year.
Plagued with a bunch of health conditions now due to poor lifestyle choices and a crappy childhood, mental health is all over the place.
Worst thing is I'm facing going to prison in a few months time, the likelihood is I will be going to prison, all for making a blog post and breaking a high court injunction, I can't say much but no doubt people will read/head about me in several months time.
People like me aren't cut out for prison.
Despite everything being so bad and longing for a peaceful death, I'm too much of a coward to do it, I've come close in the past from taking overdoses but it was almost by accident as while I intended to overdose I wasn't fully committed if that makes sense?
Where now, with the passage of time, I'm more committed mentally and emotionally and I'm sure it's what I want but it makes it all the more harder to do, I keep finding excuses in my head to hold on to life and to scare myself out of it.
I don't know man, I'm like my own worst enemy.....
Then again, I bet most people's are, not many people will be on here who doesn't feel that their life is lacking in someway and I understand that most people will be worse off than me.
To cut a long story short I had a pretty shitty childhood in and out of care and a lot of abuse in my childhood, left school with no qualifications, haven't held down a job for longer than a few months in over 15 year.
Plagued with a bunch of health conditions now due to poor lifestyle choices and a crappy childhood, mental health is all over the place.
Worst thing is I'm facing going to prison in a few months time, the likelihood is I will be going to prison, all for making a blog post and breaking a high court injunction, I can't say much but no doubt people will read/head about me in several months time.
People like me aren't cut out for prison.
Despite everything being so bad and longing for a peaceful death, I'm too much of a coward to do it, I've come close in the past from taking overdoses but it was almost by accident as while I intended to overdose I wasn't fully committed if that makes sense?
Where now, with the passage of time, I'm more committed mentally and emotionally and I'm sure it's what I want but it makes it all the more harder to do, I keep finding excuses in my head to hold on to life and to scare myself out of it.
I don't know man, I'm like my own worst enemy.....
