Help What to do with my dog..

[CravingPeace]

I love him so damn much. I have been holding out just for him, thinking I can't possibly break his heart by leaving him early. But it's starting to really get unbearable, every day I am yearning more and more for this suffering to just end.

I have a close friend that has dogsat for me overnight plenty of times in the past. His dogs love my dog. Maybe I could tell my friend that I'm sleeping over with a hookup and have him "watch him for the night". And then he can just, keep him. But then my friend will be reminded of me every time he looks at my dog. Or maybe he wouldn't want to take on extra responsibility in the midst of my leaving.

I just want my dog to be loved after I'm gone, like I love him now. I don't want to leave not knowing if he is being cared for. But this is becoming too much for me. I desperately want to leave, it hurts so bad.

I really need some brainstorming here for ideas of what I could do to ensure my dog can live a good life without me. He's 6 years old and has plenty of life ahead of him. Please help.

 

[CravingPeace]

Please help me with ideas you guys. This is the only thing stopping me for following through with my plans.

 

[wiggy]

Close family members are your most reliable bet in my opinion. Couldn't you drop him off with your parents under the pretense of having some work done at your home? If they've already had him for an extended period by the time you're gone, there wouldn't be such a strong association with your suicide.

 

[CravingPeace]

Close family members are your most reliable bet in my opinion. Couldn't you drop him off with your parents under the pretense of having some work done at your home? If they've already had him for an extended period by the time you're gone, there wouldn't be such a strong association with your suicide.

I don't have any close family members.. long story, but yeah.

 

[wiggy]

I don't have any close family members.. long story, but yeah.

I'm sorry to hear that. In that case, it will depend on your judgement of this friend. If he has other dogs, it's quite possible he will take in and care for your dog after you're gone, but it's equally possible that he would prefer not to - either because of the association with the suicide or simply because caring for a dog is a lot of work and money. Maybe you could request it in a posthunous message, even leave some money for the expenses if you can.

 

[Manfrotto99]

It's a difficult one. I hanged on for my dog and I'm glad she went before me but she was also old. Depending on how close your dog is to you maybe the best thing would be to go together and have him put down, but I really hope your friend will be able to look after him and love him as you do.

 

[gothbird]

If you're planning to pass while still in the same space as your dog, I suggest making arrangements to keep them in a separate room, with as much food and water as you believe will be needed until someone finds them. Even if you're planning to be elsewhere, it's still important to prepare in the same way.

If you're leaving a note, it might help to clearly name someone you trust to care for your dog—perhaps a friend or colleague, since I know you mentioned not having close family. You could also consider rehoming him yourself beforehand, if that feels possible.

Otherwise, it's sadly quite likely that your dog would end up at a local shelter, where outcomes can be uncertain—ranging from rehoming to euthanasia. Making a plan now can offer them the best chance at safety and comfort, whatever comes.

 

[deadbidaylight]

I agree with the above post. Trying to vet a great home for your dog before leaving will likely end in the best situation for him as possible. I wouldnt want to go either without knowing my pets would be cared for. I dont know if I could rest in peace not knowing for sure. It's not their fault.

 

[CravingPeace]

It's a difficult one. I hanged on for my dog and I'm glad she went before me but she was also old. Depending on how close your dog is to you maybe the best thing would be to go together and have him put down, but I really hope your friend will be able to look after him and love him as you do.

I truly want to hang on for him, but my desire to CTB is getting so strong. I've considered the possibility of having him put down the day of my CTB, but I don't know if a facility would just euthanize a dog just because the owner says so.

I also absolutely hate that I've considered that idea. It's not fair to choose that route for him. I just don't know what to do to ensure he doesn't suffer while I'm gone - it's a double-edged sword.

If you're planning to pass while still in the same space as your dog, I suggest making arrangements to keep them in a separate room, with as much food and water as you believe will be needed until someone finds them. Even if you're planning to be elsewhere, it's still important to prepare in the same way.

If you're leaving a note, it might help to clearly name someone you trust to care for your dog—perhaps a friend or colleague, since I know you mentioned not having close family. You could also consider rehoming him yourself beforehand, if that feels possible.

Otherwise, it's sadly quite likely that your dog would end up at a local shelter, where outcomes can be uncertain—ranging from rehoming to euthanasia. Making a plan now can offer them the best chance at safety and comfort, whatever comes.

Yes, this is why I posted this thread.. I definitely do not plan of leaving him in my apartment in another room while I CTB. I would plan on dropping him off somewhere else, preferably somewhere willing to care for him (without them knowing my CTB intentions).

I guess my real problem here is the fact that I can't just tell someone, "can you take care of my dog? I'm about to kill myself". And since we're so known to be attached by the hip, telling a friend to adopt him from me would raise significant red flags. Ugh this is awful

 

[CravingPeace]

I just submitted a rehoming request form from the shelter I adopted him at. What an absolutely gutting feeling. My heart is aching

 

[Droso]

I just submitted a rehoming request form from the shelter I adopted him at. What an absolutely gutting feeling. My heart is aching

I'm so sorry. I can tell you really love your dog. Remember, you are doing everything you can for him while being suicidal. I would recommend that you see out the full rehoming process before ctb. Find a family that will adopt him, ask them for a photo of him when he arrives to their house. You will see him happy and loved. You are not abandoning your dog, but providing him a safe and loving home before you pass on. Plenty of people with terminal illnesses or old age do this. You are not alone.

 

[divinemistress36]

Reach out to rescues

 

[Halfhourdays]

Make arrangements in your will for your pet.

 

[Jdieiejdjaow]

Had to give my dog before becoming homeless as I couldn't be emotionally available for him anymore nor was I affording long term care (safe housing, treatment etc.). It's the worst feeling. Luckily he found a home and was loved (from what I could tell) till the end when (most likely) he was put down after a few years (he was old).

I'd say, if you can hang on through the storm you're going through and reach better times, you're the only one who can take the best care of him. Otherwise, if it's impossible: like others said, ensuring he's in a proper home, you've allowed for some time to ensure they've committed to having him, is probably the best way.


Hope it works out whichever way you decide to pursue.

 

[SomewhatLoved]

I have a cat and this is a problem for me as well.

If I kill myself, I would leave a note explaining how to feed him (what type of food, how much, what toys he likes, etc). I would also write in the note that I want him to go to my brother or dad.

I have an auto-feeder for him that can hold 6 meal portions, so he would have food for a few days until my family can take care of him and figure it out. I would also make sure to fill his kitty water fountain and clean his litter box before hand so that he has everything he needs for a few days.

It's difficult. I don't 100% trust anyone to take care of him, but when I think about it honestly I'm not the greatest caretaker either. I spend way too much time in bed doing nothing and not enough taking care of him and playing with him.

 

[saturn1402]

Same exact issue here. I have a 3 year old dog who I love more than anything. She's my whole world and the main reason I am still here. The only person I truly trust to take care of her is my pet sitter. We became friends eventually and I asked her if she would keep my dog if anything happens to me. She said ofc. She doesn't know anything about my mental health issues so the question didn't raise any suspicions.

I am planning to tell her that I will be going on a trip and leave her my dog. Then ctb.

 

[CravingPeace]

Same exact issue here. I have a 3 year old dog who I love more than anything. She's my whole world and the main reason I am still here. The only person I truly trust to take care of her is my pet sitter. We became friends eventually and I asked her if she would keep my dog if anything happens to me. She said ofc. She doesn't know anything about my mental health issues so the question didn't raise any suspicions.

I am planning to tell her that I will be going on a trip and leave her my dog. Then ctb.

Ugh that's amazing. Unfortunately my best friend who I would want to leave him with, is aware of me being suicidal in the past, so I can't really ask that same question to him.. Ugh.

 

[CravingPeace]

I think I've made the decision to leave my dog with my best friend. In my note I will apologize profusely for putting the responsibility on his family, but that they are the only people I trust to do what is right for him, even if that means rehoming him elsewhere.

I honestly just don't think I could muster up the lack of empathy to leave my dog somewhere unfamiliar, scared, while I CTB.

I'm hoping that he can at least stay with them a few days during the aftermath of it all. Hopefully they decide to keep him.

 

[cantwaittoleave]

my dog is a little over 10 years old (won't post exact age here; i'm paranoid) and small. i also feel like his (natural) passing is years away and i want to stay for him, but that is becoming harder each day as well. i'm sorry.