Last Thursday I read about how Sheri Shermeyer smothered her 1 year old boy before using a gun to do herself in.
Her death was horrible no doubt about it...but what happened to that angel was too much to deal with. It's just so damn hard. It hurts to breathe at times, I sometimes feel like I am choking trying not to cry because of how I was bullied when I showed any emotions in high school after my mother killed herself.
So I'm now on borrowed time...I don't think I am going to deal with another year of working through the hurt. It's been etched into my memory. Last Thursday as soon as I was alone in my room at night I just went to the floor crying non stop for 3 hours. It was so intense I passed out and begged the Lord to take me. My chest hurt so much I thought maybe I was having a heart attack.
Not sure where to go or what to do. But I'm a complete mess right now. I am so heartbroken by this callous and cruel joke of a world.
Her death was horrible no doubt about it...but what happened to that angel was too much to deal with. It's just so damn hard. It hurts to breathe at times, I sometimes feel like I am choking trying not to cry because of how I was bullied when I showed any emotions in high school after my mother killed herself.
So I'm now on borrowed time...I don't think I am going to deal with another year of working through the hurt. It's been etched into my memory. Last Thursday as soon as I was alone in my room at night I just went to the floor crying non stop for 3 hours. It was so intense I passed out and begged the Lord to take me. My chest hurt so much I thought maybe I was having a heart attack.
Not sure where to go or what to do. But I'm a complete mess right now. I am so heartbroken by this callous and cruel joke of a world.
