Weird

[torturedbylife]

For the past month I have been experiencing this strange feeling that I never had...I don't know how to describe it, it's like making peace with life or accepting the fact that it's difficult to impossible to get rid of it right away. I just haven't thought of suicide that much. I even started to have more motivation overall and I felt at the back of my mind that I should start to be more positive. I don't know what's going on with me, it's not in my character to be like that. My life is still miserable and everything is going bad,but here I am, having these feelings. Actually, finishing high school and passing the exams probably gave me a boost. But I don't know, what i'm going through is really weird. I don't know if it happens because of the unavalability of suicide methods for me (yet) or if my mind just wants to make peace with life. Anyways I think I'm going to snap out of it soon because I'm dealing with stomach problems that really affect me. I just wanted to know if anyone else had these moments in life where they felt at peace or like they were taking a break from thinking to ctb.

 

[Luchs]

For the past month I have been experiencing this strange feeling that I never had...I don't know how to describe it, it's like making peace with life or accepting the fact that it's difficult to impossible to get rid of it right away. I just haven't thought of suicide that much. I even started to have more motivation overall and I felt at the back of my mind that I should start to be more positive. I don't know what's going on with me, it's not in my character to be like that. My life is still miserable and everything is going bad,but here I am, having these feelings. Actually, finishing high school and passing the exams probably gave me a boost. But I don't know, what i'm going through is really weird. I don't know if it happens because of the unavalability of suicide methods for me (yet) or if my mind just wants to make peace with life. Anyways I think I'm going to snap out of it soon because I'm dealing with stomach problems that really affect me. I just wanted to know if anyone else had these moments in life where they felt at peace or like they were taking a break from thinking to ctb.

I hope for you that those feelings stay and you actually manage to recover.

 

[Deleted member 17331]

The same here. I was thinking about recovering, but I discovered a new health problem... And I have no money to pay for treatment, and I will never have. At the same time, I feel that I must stay for a while, but it is difficult with so much pain.

I wish you the best, sending you a thousand hugs

 

[Deleted member 1465]

We are such complex creatures. We think we want something but our bodies and deep minds can tell us otherwise if we are able to listen. Listening is hard. Maybe you are learning to listen more? I hope it continues for you and leads you to what you need.